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valentines past
| Open Poetry #44 |
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valentines past |
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adamjames72 New Member
since 2009-02-17
Posts 6 |
Hello everyone, it is nice to see this forum. I like how it seems that everyone is supportive on this one, and I look forward to getting to know everyone through their writing. I am a fairly new writer in the poetic sense, I have always had a nac for APA style writing, especially a reporting style of writing, but it is only recently that I started taking my emotions or feelings, and putting them into rhyme and meter. This is one of my most recent poems, written for an ex. I have an edited version, but this is my original, I wanted to see if anyone suggested the same edits. The fire in my heart has been gone I haven't felt that way in so long There are many times of the year to think back On things that have happened, things of the past The season of love is upon us And now it hits me like a bus How happy I was to have you How lucky I was we pulled through The beginning was rough, we were confused The middle was epic, nothing could diffuse The love that we had It all didn't end well, but it was worth it Those short 18 months, I will never forget They say you never forget your first This I know is true, I'll always remember you So this valentines, with my heart so empty I'm content to think back, on how we were so happy We have gone our seperate ways Those days are draped in a mystic haze While we are on to bigger and better My heart is not bitter Just happy for the time, it couldn't have been better I hope this valentines is as good as last Please take a moment to look at the past It is the best valentines I have ever gotten And it will live on and on, never forgotten -Adam |
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| © Copyright 2009 adamjames72 - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Adam, Welcome to Passions! I'm sure there will be those who will enjoy helping you edit your poem, but for now... please check your email for a Very Special Greeting! " It matters not this distance now " Excerpt, Yesterday's Love |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Welcome to PIP, Adam. Hope to see more of your writing. Ida |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Welcome to these blue pages, and thanks for this tender write. While you might have areas you could edit, I enjoy being given a chance to read first drafts, as they are often much closer to the writer's heartbeat. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Hi, Adam! Welcome to pipTalk! "My heart is not bitter" ~ and that is quite apparent! lol A very sweet VD write! May "the season of love" be yours throughout the year!  Giving you a warm, welcoming pip hug, Earth Angel  |
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adamjames72 New Member
since 2009-02-17
Posts 6 |
Thanks very much for the warm welcome everybody. |
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