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Open Poetry #44
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A bullet with my name...
| Open Poetry #44 |
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A bullet with my name... |
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poddarku Senior Member
since 2008-01-15
Posts 589india 
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A bullet with my name… (They said,) There is a bullet with my name written on it. It set out of a pipe, hot, energetic. It has a metal determination, cold. I can anticipate, feel the bullet’s approach behind my back; still a long way to cover. The bullet swims through the stale air of the city,- over the roofs of the old and new buildings, dribbling the innocent girls having a chat; it stops at the crossings; let the slow train pass; at the noon market it has a siesta with flies buzzing around its explosive nose. Awake it asks the idle boy aiming a bird, “Where does he live? The man whose name is on me?” I know I should answer him. Rightly? Yes. =© 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar clever talks delay friendship! |
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| © Copyright 2009 poddar kushal - All Rights Reserved | |||
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Hope you make it home safely. Wonderful perspective in this piece! Eric |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
fine writing...James |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
This is also (as usual) a superbly written poem. Based on the last word of the poem, I think you meant the first question in the third-last line, asked of the boy aiming at a bird, to be, "Do you know where he lives?" so that "Yes" would answer it. Again, I say that it is amazing how you can get into the head of other people and know the depths of their feelings. The imaginative path of the bullet (and how the speaker in the poem feels the bullet is mercilessly, and in cold blood, hunting him down) is masterfully described. And the simultaneous power and powerlessness/fatalism of that last word, of the poem - a three-lettered word, but what a climax! I hope this is not about anyone you know. Owl |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Well. Ku, New Years Eve night a bullet came through my roof into my bedroom. Maybe we both have a bullet with our name on it. Ida |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
You have created suspension here in such an impressive way, that I could almost hear the bullet swishing through the air ... So vividly rendered, dear Ku! Love, Margherita  |
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