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Open Poetry #44
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poddarku
Senior Member
since 2008-01-15
Posts 589
india

0 posted 2009-02-07 10:18 PM



art of heart breaking

A too late goodbye denies gravity,
it flies over the tiny patch of green
and sits on the cornice. The dry petals
of paper flowers are on the roof, mourning.

It is dead. Staring at the watch she realizes.
The letter in her clutch is of her friend, love…
a mere rally of alphabets, bleak, black,
inpatient and knows in future it is
going to be burnt…

A smoky smell of the season burns eyes.
Long ago she has been told not cry
by a man who has hidden behind a lie,
who can murmur millions of dreams and
breaks each into pieces with only words
from across the sea where now he is.
A too late goodbye ruptures exchanged vows
secretly.  
       © 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar

clever talks delay friendship!

© Copyright 2009 poddar kushal - All Rights Reserved
OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
1 posted 2009-02-08 12:13 PM


Kushal, this has me in tears.  It is an exceptionally well written poem and expresses the pent-up feelings of one taught not to cry.  

If this is about a real person, she needs to have the opportunity to express her feelings to somebody else - be it a family member, a friend, a religious leader, a psychiatrist, a psychologist, or even a caring acquaintance.  In 63 years I have found that when all seems lost, it actually isn't, no matter what the situation is.  

What one needs first and immediately is to get at least a tiny bit of relief from those feelings, so that one can start the slow journey away from the pain.  I have found that the best way to do that is to have the opportunity to talk to somebody.  Firstly that gives one the opportunity to release one's feelings, even if that person doesn't know how to help or have the words to help, as many people don't.  (That can sometimes increase the pain temporarily, but then what one needs is to turn to somebody else, until one finds a person ready, willing and able to help.) A solution isn't what is needed immediately.  Often one will find a person who can, simply with a hug, or making one a cup of tea, or provide a listening ear, make one feel a tiny bit better.  And that is the start.  There is a very comforting sentence in the Bible that says, "And this, too, shall pass."  In 63 years, I have found it very comforting and true, although it doesn't seem true to the person in pain at the time.  

If this is about a real person, please tell her all of the above.

Owl

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
2 posted 2009-02-08 12:15 PM


A lot of history for the reader to imagine in this piece which makes the sadness  virtually full of sorrowful closure as images appear.
Superb writing!

Eric

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
3 posted 2009-02-08 07:46 PM


Oh, gosh, dear Ku, you have no idea what memories you brought back with this poignant, beautifully written piece of great poetry!

Love and hugs, dear Poet.
Margherita

HelmutB
Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964
Canada
4 posted 2009-02-08 08:19 PM


Sad, but yet powerful
well written

The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools.  


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