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Open Poetry #44
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An Ode to Sorrow
| Open Poetry #44 |
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An Ode to Sorrow |
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Suncleaver Member
since 2009-01-18
Posts 481Stafford England 
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O weep shattered sky and drown this sundered earth When every tear shed runs red with life’s blood When every despairing cry is a peal of piercing thunder O bleed the heavens of their tears for mine are spent Wind rage and scream my pain over barren plains Earth crack and give form to the chasm of my soul O cleave the very sun as my broken heart fragments Shadow of night swallow the last beacons of hope Fire scorch and water crush Let the very elements manifest this sorrow Never sigh for a better world, it's already composed, played and told. [This message has been edited by Suncleaver (02-08-2009 04:20 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2009 Luke Doubtfire - All Rights Reserved | |||
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Powerful Shakespearean type of lament in this piece. Great lines! Eric |
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gilead Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067nevada, USA |
Yes, I like the classical flavor in this also, that touch of the romantic in the fervor of lament. The emotions run deep, and you've expressed them well. Best wishes, art |
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Anniepimm Senior Member
since 2008-12-26
Posts 550England |
A very nice poem  Really makes you think about life.. And the ode type are always more profound |
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turtle Senior Member
since 2009-01-23
Posts 548Harbor |
Most of this is well written. Traditionally an ode should have "Ode" in the title. "An Ode To Sorrow" Perhaps? I notice that you have stanza breaks, but don't use them. Is there a reason? Turtle |
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Suncleaver Member
since 2009-01-18
Posts 481Stafford England |
I would like to thank you all for appreciating this poem and especially Turtle for his constructive comments. His misgivings where indeed well founded as I wrote and posted this poem whilst in a state of being dead drunk. A mistake I shall not make again... hopefully. Smiles all. Never sigh for a better world, it's already composed, played and told. [This message has been edited by Suncleaver (02-08-2009 04:21 AM).] |
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