Last Poem Tonight - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Open Poetry #44

Last Poem Tonight

Juju
Member Elite

since 2003-12-29

Posts 3429
In your dreams

0 posted 2009-02-05 12:30 PM

Last Poem Tonight

Sometimes I wonder
If the cool winter
Froze your heart shut too

If somewhere or how
Our memories shattered
Into small diamonds

I had nothing left
and I was left behind

I want to burn my
pedestal you made
So I can screw up

Juju

-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

1 posted 2009-02-05 09:09 AM

quote:
If somewhere or how
Our memories shattered
Into small diamonds

Nice write. Beautiful thought!

Love,
Margherita

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-25

Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

2 posted 2009-02-05 09:37 AM

Yo dear Juju,

I change the "can't" in the last line to "can".

You'll have more fun that way.

Love Bobby

Juju
Member Elite

since 2003-12-29

Posts 3429
In your dreams

3 posted 2009-02-05 09:43 AM

Rob,

Good point thankyou

Juju

-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

4 posted 2009-02-05 09:56 AM

Really enjoyed the last stanza, Juju...

Very good!

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.