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Open Poetry #44

sonnet

Lisa Teller
Junior Member

since 2009-01-27

Posts 11
usa

0 posted 2009-01-29 12:20 PM

Cruel Lover Sonnet.
My love for you has no limit
My love for you, beyond thoughts compare,
to a day most sunny and fair.
My life empty without you in it

The touch of your lips to mine,
my dancing heart skips rhythm, and beat
Your silent words spoken, speak of deceit
My love for you the unpunishable crime.

And so I must suffer, torment alone
My own prison, your heart its home.
Until I lay cradled in loves’ desire
fanning the flames that feed the fire
Shall I die unquenched, to love another?
What fate shall I suffer cruel lover?

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

1 posted 2009-01-29 12:28 PM

Hello, Lisa!

I am transferring your poem to the Open forum, where it will get much more exposure and better feeedback.

Juju
Member Elite

since 2003-12-29

Posts 3429
In your dreams

2 posted 2009-01-29 12:52 PM

Hehehehe yes. Boys like that are like little demons aye?

-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-25

Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

3 posted 2009-01-29 01:01 PM

Yo dear Lisa Teller,

Your poem has decent end rhymes and meter.

Love Bobby

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