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Open Poetry #44
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woodtic
Member
since 2002-01-06
Posts 87


0 posted 2009-01-24 01:18 AM


sipping whiskey  
single malt
neat
neater yet
the feelings
get
a little over fine.

thinking would I
like another
one more for the road.

sorry state
my dire fate
if more I would
imbibe.

a draft a sip
the little lift
that covers over
want

what is needed
not received
in this melancholy haunt

dizzy now
this ill effect
embers on my tongue
bar tender
another one

© Copyright 2009 woodtic - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2009-01-24 07:08 PM


I don't know whether to laugh or cry...

but I am reminded, even as I type that, I am totally capable of both at once.


woodtic
Member
since 2002-01-06
Posts 87

2 posted 2009-01-24 07:51 PM


thank you for peeking in.


turtle
Senior Member
since 2009-01-23
Posts 548
Harbor
3 posted 2009-01-24 10:02 PM


Hi woodtic,

I liked this one as well. Minimal and rhythmic. The flow of thought also works.

Turtle

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
4 posted 2009-01-24 10:38 PM


I like the short snippy lines, and the way you proceed from a little drink to a little too much to drink.  And I especially like the way you don't belabor the reason behind it; you allude, but don't shove it down my throat.  Which is a good thing, because I'm only drinking tea.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

woodtic
Member
since 2002-01-06
Posts 87

5 posted 2009-01-25 02:39 AM


Thanks, there are not many things that keep their  taste when shoved down your throat.
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
6 posted 2009-01-26 02:33 PM


what is needed
not received
in this melancholy haunt

It rarely is, but we keep looking! *S*

Enjoyed!

woodtic
Member
since 2002-01-06
Posts 87

7 posted 2009-01-26 09:33 PM


Thanks for lookin in. S
Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
8 posted 2009-01-27 07:20 PM


I like the short lines and the way you allude as well. Not too much, just enough.
                                 Ida

woodtic
Member
since 2002-01-06
Posts 87

9 posted 2009-01-27 11:14 PM


with regard to sipping whiskey that is the wiseset course, thanks Ida
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