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Open Poetry #44
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Someday I'll Tell Her I Dropped It On Purpose.
| Open Poetry #44 |
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Someday I'll Tell Her I Dropped It On Purpose. |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. 
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Intricately tattooed into the nape of her neck, I saw a flowered Devil. Horns, pitchfork, the works. My bus station love was a bit too thin. Like wrapping birthday presents in tracing paper. I rewound, and reset the tape deck. added more confidence, upgraded my level cleaned away a few quirks My unexposed hands in new leather gloves, I raised my strongly squared chin. dropped some dollars, a few cents. bumped into her. _________________________________________________ First attempt at rhyming. It's clumsy, and I got so ridiculously frustrated that I had to stop working at it, before I lit the notebook on fire. I always seem to get an idea or two after it's fermented a few days on the boards.... but still. Rhyming is wicked hard. Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand. [This message has been edited by viking_metal (01-20-2009 01:40 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2009 Paul Weisbrod - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Anniepimm Senior Member
since 2008-12-26
Posts 550England |
I always found rhyming easy and fun I like this poem with it's simplicity very good write  |
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Marc-Andre Senior Member
since 2008-12-07
Posts 501 |
I also think rhyming is fun. Have you tried using a rhyming dictionary? Here's an online one: http://www.rhymezone.com/ Enjoy the process, that's what it's all about Mark |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
It constrains my ability to use words that express exactly how I feel. I don't like it much, but if I keep working at it I'm sure I'll come around. Thanks dudes. -P Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand. |
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Boshii2 Member
since 2009-02-01
Posts 146 |
rhyming is not for you I am |
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Paul, I've never beem good at rhyming. I never even try it. Bobby |
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Alison 
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
It's always good to explore new styles of writing - or that's what I think. But, that's not to say that I don't seek out your poems (becasuse I do). This did not disappoint me at all - and I love the title. Alison |
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