Waiting for You (Please respond)

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Teen Poetry #1

Waiting for You (Please respond)

Isabelle
Member

since 1999-08-25

Posts 176
Indiana

0 posted 1999-09-18 10:15 PM

As I sit here on the dock
With my legs dangling over the edge
I sit and watch the waves in the water
I take in a deep breath and close my eyes
I imagine that your here with me

As I sit here on the dock
I watch as the sun sets beyond the trees
I watch as the beautiful colors reflect off
the water
I wait as the day goes by before me
I wait for you

As I sit here on the dock
It's getting dark now
I lay back and look at the beautiful stars
I could sit here all night and watch them
twinkle
As I wait for you

LoveAngel2000
Junior Member

since 1999-09-17

Posts 11
Knoxville, Tenessee (home of the Inbreds)

1 posted 1999-09-19 07:50 AM

That was a great poem! You should be a professional poet, you would really make it! It makes me think because I am in a situation just like yours.Well good luck and good bye!!!

LOVEANGEL2000

StratMatt
Member

since 1999-09-19

Posts 87
Macomb, IL, U.S.A.

2 posted 1999-09-20 12:18 PM

I enjoyed this poem a lot.
The repetition at the beginning of every stanza is a good effect. I've oftentimes sat by a lake near by house just thinking, it reminds me of that. Especially one incident where I sat there with my now ex-girlfriend, just talking while watching the sunset.

Very nice poem.
-Matt

------------------
"Lost time is never found again." -Ben Franklin.

Systematic Decay
Senior Member

since 1999-09-15

Posts 1301
That place with padded walls and funny people in white.........

3 posted 1999-09-20 12:24 PM

I particularly liked it for the imagery.....because to me there is nothing more beautiful than the sun setting over a lake, making a rainbow of colors in the sky....especially when you are watching it with someone you love.....or while waiting for someone you love.......
i completely relat to the poem....i've been there.....i like it alot

"The sun is gone,
But I have a light.....
I think I'm dumb,
Or maybe just happy....."
-Kurt Cobain-

Isabelle
Member

since 1999-08-25

Posts 176
Indiana

4 posted 1999-09-20 10:54 PM

Thanks you guys. I appreciate your responses. I am really glade you guys liked it. =)

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