The Prairie Lands, USA
There are different kinds of love, Zach. Could very well be that you are falling in love. My first thought was "if you are wondering, it is probably close to love!"
Describe it? My first love, is still my most powerful. I still think about Tommy and what we had... and by the way, this is NOT my ex-husband...lol... anyway, back to Tommy.
I couldn't wait to see him again, talk to him, be with him, touch his skin - just a silly guessture (not talking about sex here). When we did see each other, it was the looks. But I must add, we were both falling in love, so I guess that might be different than you situation. I don't know.
We dated for a year off and on, and when we weren't dating, I was miserable.
Tommy was a beautiful lesson and a hard lesson. I learned that love is good. It makes one feel that they are queen/king. All those insecurities seem to disappear.
But, all good comes with the opposite effect. I also learned that sometimes love isn't enough.
Looking back on it now, I know that it was true love, though, I too questioned it at the time. What a blessing!
Keep in mind, this it the time you are to be learning about these things. Follow your feelings, let it ride, and learn from it.
LOL... I should follow my own advice, and actually, I am. I'm just doing it a bit later in life than you are! You are doing it right though Zach. I was always too serious and too worried as a teenager. Try to go with the flow and know that your river is going where it should!