Thank you all.
I was having a bad day to begin with, as there are personal problems I'm having to deal with (and normally I tell ya'll everything, but generally after the fact ) but I want to reasure you all, and I've been thinking about why this hit me so hard (in the plexus, as Kacy put it) and it's just my concern for my people in this community. Suicide is not an option in my personal book of coping strategy.
I worry though, because I have seen firsthand that it can be "contagious." (I knew a family with six kids as I was growing up--by the time I was twenty, half of them were gone, by their own hands) so please know that I know it's not an option.
Somedays I just feel overwhelmed, and you guys are the only folks I have to talk with that seem to understand. I have a few friends left here, but not many--as I chose to discontinue relationships with most of them because of bad habits I can no longer tolerate and refuse to condone, even by association.
So I get lonely, and I feel kind of helpless some days, but it sure is nice--no, it is wonderful to know that I can come here and find a kind word, encouragement, and even love and laughter.
It's not always horrible here. It's just that some days are very, very difficult.
So thank you.