British Columbia, Canada
You know I am really having trouble with the anxiety I feel for you folks down south. I have never actually experienced any extreme weather, but sure feel it through the love of friends in here. The empathy I feel for those people is literally making me ill! I am serious; it actually gives me headaches, and makes me sick until I know they are safe! Then again, that is human nature. Karen and I were just talking and it's like I have these empathy pains right in tune with her emotions at any given time, it's right wierd.
Well...I have lived on the side of this beautiful mountain almost 40 years this year.
At this very moment I am packed and ready to move somewhere, anywhere but here.
To be honest, some (including my family,) think me a tad crazy as I have a beautiful place here with an outstanding view, etc. and The Winter Olympics are coming and all that jazz. However, you know, I seldom even look out this window but today I did to take this to show you all the view of the ocean and downtown. House guests love it, but like all things in life you get used to it I guess. I go out most days, as it is healthy for mind, and body.
All I can think about is the earthquake they have been warning me about for years now and the climatic changes we are experiencing here. For crying out loud it is September and we are still having summer! Vancouver is usually boot high in rain about now. I never really took it seriously before the time all this devastation came up with all our friends in here. I even said to someone, "What price we pay for Paradise." Now with the hurricane in Louisiana, and Mississippi, along with all the weather threats on all our coastlines, Paradise seems to be moving inland and for darn good reason.
I have waiting to hear if I got a "Little blue and white birdhouse with a view," as Janet Marie has called it. It is not that far away from Vancouver, and so close to my son and his family (meaning ma girls.) It rests in a forest setting with nice winding walking paths where you can actually hear birds singing. It is only a one-bedroom place with a huge sundeck, what more do I need? It is still on a slight "incline" as Nan calls them, but close enough to walk to the ocean for playing cause Kit likes that when she comes to visit. Those visits from friends in here are the highlight of my day by the way! Bought me a blow-up bed for such occassions (I will take that honest!)
My current residence in the winter You could almost put the one I want in a corner of the old one couldn't you?
In other words, it took seeing my friends suffering to actually get me to move, something I should have done ages ago. I put up with a lot of "stuff" living where I am and take it for the sake that I live in a very desirable area of this city, but now realize that "Home Is Where The Heart Is," not "stuff", your address, or a "view," etc. I have given away a TON of stuff to people, and felt really good about this downsizing business, as less is more has never been my motto really being somewhat of an ecclectic treasure hunter by nature (a nice way to put I love th shop.)
I intend to turn my life around to, make way more friends, get out way more to events, exercise more, and socialize with anyone who will listen, or put up with me. This decision came on a day I cried and got sick to my stomach for a friend that lost a lot and was in harm's way again! That became the very day I found out finally what life was truly about. Not stuff, possessions, status, who you know, or where you have been, but how you interact with your fellow beings during your time here on this plain. I knew I made a difference in that way, and the rest was all "dressing!" So, without all the dressing, off I go to start the beginning of the rest of my life for the better.
You know, I care about everyone probably too much, but consider it a quality not a downfall like they try to tell me/you. You learn from sharing the good and bad that others experience, but it is what you do with that information that really matters most. I have had years of hearing it all as a councilor, and a volunteer with abused women and children, and the aged and infirm. You know I think until this last hurricane and 911, I let it go in one ear and out the other because it didn't affect me, and also you are trained to "not take it home!" Yeah well what if it does happen to you? This time the grief, loss and harm to my friends shot me right in the heart and it was then I knew it was definitely time for a change before it is too late.
I won't even know if I got this place until tomorrow and going a little crazy waiting to hear, but I do know this for sure, I am definitely packed to go somewhere close to my family, and I know for certain that peace is finally going to find me there. I just don't wish to pay the price of living in paradise anymore.
Now how's that for a ramble? I just had to put some meaning into all the grief, loss, and hurt I was spared from, and make it a positive move, so wish me luck on finding a place to move this stuff to won't you?
To see real beauty - look with your heart.
~ Carpe diem ~
[This message has been edited by Mysteria (09-20-2005 08:50 PM).]