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He's a fighter...but should i be mad at the hospital?

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eor
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since 09-26-2002
Posts 968
blues & greys


0 posted 04-03-2004 07:14 AM       View Profile for eor   Email eor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for eor


  So here is the story, my grandfather has been walking around wiht a brain ansurim(sp?) for over five years now and still going strong...but about 3 months ago he was diagnosed wiht lung and kidney cancer...talk about your 3 strikes, but my grandpa plays by differnt rules...so anyways the doctors didnt want to operate on the kidney cancer bacause he would still be left with the lung cancer so why put him through all of that just to be left wiht cancer...so he has been taking meds for the past three months to help stop the cancer from spreading...but the meds made him really dehydrated, and so a week ago he was admitted to the hospital...the pumped him full of fluids to help correct the prolbem...but in doing so the caused him to have a massive heart attack...if aint one thing it sure is another...so anyways the docs have kept him sedated this past week to let his body heal, and he is stabilizing, but still having trouble breathing on his own and he is still listed in critical condition.  now im not a doctor, i dont pretend to think i know medicine, but from what i understand it was pumping him too full of liquids too fast that caused the heart attack...and i dont know...i mean shouldent the doctors have known?...and not to mention all this stress on his body could cause the anurism to pop...it just infurates me, and i am not sure if i have a right to be...is it reall their fault? could/should they have know this would happen?  it seems irresponsible to me, i dont know, i really dont know what to say...besides im pissed...someone tell me do i have reason/right to be, should the doctors have forseen this, i mean thats why we pay them right, not just to do some half cocked job, espically dealing with an elderly man...ok ill stop now...any thoughts?

"So what befalls the flawless?
Look what I've built, it shines so beautifully now watch as it destroys me."

nakdthoughts
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since 10-29-2000
Posts 19275
Between the Lines


1 posted 04-03-2004 08:59 AM       View Profile for nakdthoughts   Email nakdthoughts   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nakdthoughts

Let me put it this way...he is like my sister...he has so many things going wrong in his body that there is no hope, unless a miracle, that he can be cured. When there is so much wrong you cannot blame the doctors nor a hospital.

The medicine, if it was dehydrating him, your grandfather...should have  been drinking more liquids...but sometimes with all those organs not working properly, he may have not felt like it...just as my sister does not feel like eating much now.

Giving him care in the hospital with fluids probably did not give him a heart attack
...if anything it has given him more time to live and think what would have happened if he was not in the hospital when he had that heart attack...it would have delayed his care. Obviously his cancer has spread to several important organs and if they cannot operate all they are doing is giving him more time to live even if not the way we would wish life to be.

And the doctors are not "God" despite what people think. The fact that he has lung cancer and trouble breathing on his own is probably why they could not operate on him.

Anesthesia could end his life faster...just my opinion from spending this last year and these final months with my sister who is 61 and has a failing liver, double hernias, and lung cancer that has spread into the second lung making it so that she cannot even have radiation again, or "those pills" for chemo to stop the spread.

Enjoy and share your love with your grandfather for whatever time is left and don't go into the
"blaming game" ...it is a waste of precious time.

Maureen
Ringo
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2 posted 04-03-2004 07:44 PM       View Profile for Ringo   Email Ringo   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ringo

eor- I certainly understand your predicament. My mother-in-law was the same way with ehr medical profile. And it was the doctors fishing for something that caused her to be acting the way she was that caused (in my opinion) the death from the stroke tht she had. The one thing that kept me from getting severely angry atr the hospital and the doctors is a phrase that I learned in EMT school all those years ago...
It is called "practicing" medicine for a reason. Should they have known? Yes. Is it possible that they felt that stopping the de-hydration quickly was worth the risk? I can't answer that. Is it possible he was going to have that MI anyhow? Maybe.
The only thing I can suggest, and this is also coming from experience from watching my father go slowly, is to enjoy the time you have left, and ask the Good Lord (or Buddah, or the Earth mother, or the head of cabbage in the corner... whomever) to make your grandfather as pain free as possible for the amount of time he has left, whatever that might be. And then make sure you spend "quality" time rather than "quantity" time with him every time you can... and get him talking about his life and the family history, and get it on tape... you would be suprised at what you hear, what you learn, and how important those tapes are going to be to you in the future.
*adding my thoughts and good wishes the the pile you are already receiving*

Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs...

Sunshine
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Listening to every heart


3 posted 04-03-2004 08:36 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


Eor, all I can say, from my line of work in reviewing medical records on a regular basis, is, yes, you can question the practitioners.  You can question the hospital procedures.  You can do it AFTERWARDS...

for now?  If you feel your grandfather is not getting the proper help, then ask him if he wishes to have a second/third/fourth opinion.  If his insurance company and/or his finances allow, get other opinions.

But as Ringo said...it is the quality time along with the mental, physical and emotional input that he receives from you and your family that will mean the most to him.

It's a very, very difficult time, not just for you, but for your entire family.  

I will keep you all in my prayers.
eor
Senior Member
since 09-26-2002
Posts 968
blues & greys


4 posted 04-03-2004 09:10 PM       View Profile for eor   Email eor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for eor

Thank you all for your thoughts...it means a lot really...and nakedthoughts this is not ment to be argumentive or anything...maybe i didnt word it right in my post, but the fluids pumped into him as such a fast rate did cause the heart attack that what the doctors told my familr, and he knew the medicine was dehydrating him and was doing something about it but he couldent do enough thats why he admitted himself in the first place...i know i shouldent play the 'blame game', cause ringo made a good point, it is 'praticing medicine', but i guess i am somewhat so angry because i am in north carolina and he is in delaware and it not like i can go see him every weekend, i have school...i dont know i guess i am angry and need to vent...but thanks for listining
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 10-29-2000
Posts 19275
Between the Lines


5 posted 04-04-2004 10:42 PM       View Profile for nakdthoughts   Email nakdthoughts   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nakdthoughts

Eor, you can always  question the doctors
and what could have and should have been done... my sister's lung cancer was a speck on an MRI or scan just before her hernia operation. They should have caught it while operable, but didn't.
So when she had the emergency hernia operation, the cancer spread. She was in need of a liver transplant and was waiting for a donor, which  was available on New Years...but it was too late.

Once she had the inoperable cancer, the liver transplant was no longer possible..they don't waste an organ on someone  who is going to die anyway...so we can be mad and angry but it is such a waste of emotions...
I hope the best for your grandfather and will keep him and you in my thoughts and prayers.
Maureen
eor
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since 09-26-2002
Posts 968
blues & greys


6 posted 04-07-2004 12:33 PM       View Profile for eor   Email eor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for eor

thank you so much for your thoughts...
 
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