i can't even put my feelings into words properly...

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quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

0 posted 2002-10-29 01:13 AM

i am falling in love with being sad,

all over again.

now if only there was a smiley for that. heh.

it's more accepting the romanticism of depression.

acknowledging emotions for being as beautiful as they are.

oh i'm rambling.

somedays i feel as though i'll never truly get better.

/jen/

what if they gave a war, and nobody came...

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

1 posted 2002-10-29 01:19 AM

If we look at this as though 'sad' was a person, what attracts you to 'sad'? What do YOU get out of the relationship?

quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

2 posted 2002-10-29 01:28 AM

i've gotten my life.

i wouldn't be who i am, or where i am, if the steps i took were different.

i picture it this way:

if i never 'met sad', then i would have become a flitty little teeny bopper.

i wouldn't be as intelligent and well versed as i am.  i wouldn't see the world for what it really is, or the people in it for who they really are.

i would be gullible and naieve and sheltered.

i would be weak.  for i wouldn't have had the opportunity to learn to survive.

i've learned almost all of my lessons the hard way.  from experience.  and that is how i've gotten here.

thank you very much.

just thinking about that helped me out.

you're a hell of a lot better than some of the shrinks i've had.

/jen/

what if they gave a war, and nobody came...

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

3 posted 2002-10-29 01:38 AM

Anytime you feel like shrinking or curling up into a tiny ball of sad, stop by this passionate poetic office for a chat. We don't even charge.
You are feeling deep emotions, and that in itself can be a happy thing. Think about it....some people never get that far into Life...to really feel anything with such intensity.
Peaceful thoughts to you, friend. You are 'weller' than you think.

Christopher

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-02

Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

4 posted 2002-10-29 01:49 AM

jen - not that it really helps, but know you're not alone and it's not forever (so i've heard, haven't gotten to that point yet).

we have the same friends... sad and i go way back, way back. best buds and all.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

5 posted 2002-10-29 08:15 AM

I've sat here for a while now trying to decide if I was going to post to this, or just keep my "sad" to myself for a change. After awhile I get tired of hearing me, so why wouldnt everyone else? ya know?--I mean, the world seems to be full of people walking around carrying this baggage and we dont even seem to know why. I've said in here before...I refer to it as being "born depressed."  Its just always been there..like a shadow. And I wonder why we, I, settle for it? When I read Jen's comment about "falling in love with sad" something just struck me...and when she said how being sad effected her and the person she's become.
But it all makes me want to ask-- arent we supposed to be "flitty teenagers?" Shouldnt we be allowed that? Why do we have to grow up so fast and be so serious. Why do our emotions have to own us? Yes, emotions are beautiful...all of them...but only in moderation and balance. So why do I feel so comfortable with sad? Why is "happy" so foreign? It's like having to give a speech in public or dance in front of people when you dont know how..always feeling like youre gonna make a fool of yourself.  I look at the beauty and talent and potential in this place, and I see so many resigned to "sad."
I'm 44 years old and I'm tired...tired of carrying sad around on my chest...
and when I see someone like Jenn, or Chris, saying these things it makes me want to tell you both...and anyone feeling the same way...
dont settle for sad as friend, lover, or constant companion. We need to take back whats been missing, we need to find out why we are this way.. I dont want my kids to settle for this. I dont any want anyone to settle for this. And yes..I know...its real easy to give advice I cant seem to take for myself......
I'm sorry..Im moth rambling...I wish I had something profound to say that would help me understand why sad is so constant for so many. Thanks  for listening to mothyme.

[This message has been edited by Janet Marie (10-29-2002 08:16 AM).]

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

6 posted 2002-10-29 06:59 PM

Sad is:

safer - if you're sad, you stay alone, don't try for relationships so you won't be hurt

comforting - sad's activities are staying at home; hiding in bed; reading; happy would take you outside - rock climbing - snowboarding - karoake singing

different - if you're sad and 'act it' you stand out sometimes in a crowd. people talk about you, wonder what's up with you so you become mysterious and 'different'. If everyone else is happy and you were too, then you'd just blend in

sometimes clinical - get to the doctor to see if there is a chemical imbalance!!!! It can happen

misunderstood - are you SURE you're sad all the time or are you just 'laid back'? Do you EVER smile? Ever laugh? Ever do something for the joy of it? (Go take care of a toddler - there is no way to stay sad when you've got an excited 2 year old on your hands)

**
The was we are raised and the environment we lived in have a lot to do with the 'sad' part of us. And if you don't have lots of happy kid memories, then I implore you to get some medical help. Chemical imbalances should be checked first, if they are fine, then find a good counselor to talk to ..and don't give up.

and one last thing - once a day, whether you feel like it or not, find something to smile about - even if it's the thought of Chris in his muscle shirt!

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

7 posted 2002-10-30 07:29 AM

hey m'dear

I sent you a small email in reply to the one you sent me. A follow up one is coming.

You and I both know what the sadness is - it's a bitch so don't let it beat you. Remember, drugs exist. You can kick it's ass.

Anti Lemming Crusader - Fight against the conformity!

quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

8 posted 2002-10-30 06:18 PM

i have a chemical imbalance, or so the doctors say. i've been on so many meds i can't even remember them all. in and out of hospitals, doctor after doctor. been there, done that, got the teeshirt.

bleh.

/jen/

what if they gave a war, and nobody came...

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

9 posted 2002-10-30 09:31 PM

You a gemini Jen? Sometimes people seek sadness- I know I get bored when things are going smoothly. I almost expect something bad to happen during that time.
Sometimes people forget to see that their lives, although full of depressive moments, have their highs. Damnit, depressing stuff is what makes the world go around...look at it this way, if we hadn't had moments in our lves which we wanted removed...why would anyone woud ever stive to "make the world a better place"?

Burn the shirt, keep the logo and paste it to the sole of your shoe hun...it's better there

Are you scared? BOO! Are you now?

quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

10 posted 2002-10-30 10:06 PM

nope cher, i'm an aries.

:: shrugs ::

/jen/

what if they gave a war, and nobody came...

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