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Ok This is Not a Poem I Just Dont Know Where to Put it.. Please Respond

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Some One
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since 04-07-2001
Posts 11


0 posted 06-22-2001 09:58 PM       View Profile for Some One   Email Some One   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Some One

Hey all. um i got this situation.. I like this girl she is the best. she is the world to me but her mum has seperated us, and we cannot see each other her mum told me that i am not aloud to ring her or go to her house any more, i dont know what to do
help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


1 posted 06-22-2001 09:59 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Someone, I am going to put this under "Discussions" in "Feelings".  Someone there will surely be willing to give some advice.
Some One
Junior Member
since 04-07-2001
Posts 11


2 posted 06-22-2001 10:00 PM       View Profile for Some One   Email Some One   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Some One

thanx
LoveBug
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3 posted 06-23-2001 12:38 AM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

If you really like this person, try to keep contact with her in some way. Maybe you could e-mail each other, or even use snail mail. Maybe you can talk to the mother and see why she is so upset about the situation and if there's anything you can do to work things out. Best of luck!

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

Sunshine
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since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


4 posted 06-23-2001 07:36 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

LoveBug has some good advice. You don't give your ages, perhaps this girl is very young? And her mother has certain guidelines and rules?  Are your parents willing to help you see this girl again, perhaps a chaperoned date?  There are many ways to work this out, given this limited information. Overall, keep everything you do above board, so that the girl's mother will never be upset or angry at any action you take.  Let us know how things work out, or give us some more information and perhaps we can come up with some better suggestions.
Some One
Junior Member
since 04-07-2001
Posts 11


5 posted 06-24-2001 05:42 AM       View Profile for Some One   Email Some One   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Some One

Yeah. um im 16 and Carly is 14 the parents dont know how old i am and my parents are ok with it. i talked to her dad and he told me that she is not aloud to see guys at all until she finishes her year 12 studies. she is in year 9 now. um im in Australia so we have diffrent school stuff than in America.
hush
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since 05-27-2001
Posts 1693
Ohio, USA


6 posted 06-24-2001 11:34 PM       View Profile for hush   Email hush   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for hush

It seems like maybe you need to establish some trust with her parents. If they don't even know how old you are, then there is a definite issue of them not knowing you well. It's really not that drastic of an age difference. Besides, people that are at the saem maturity level seem to go to each other, regardless the age- the dating rule seems crazy- maybe the chaperoned date idea would work.

everything's fine.

Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


7 posted 06-25-2001 02:43 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Here in the United States there was some semblance of rules and guidelines in years past....so I am speaking from old hat experience, but always - always - treat the parents with respect.  They only have their child's welfare at heart.  Perhaps if you could visit her at their home?  To spend time together, reading, playing board games, getting to know the family?  If your parents are understanding, may be you could enlist their help in setting something like this up?  Perhaps both families get together for a social time?

Just some suggestions of "old world" values....
White Wolf
Member
since 09-18-99
Posts 384
Somewhere in the vast wastelan


8 posted 06-26-2001 03:29 AM       View Profile for White Wolf   Email White Wolf   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for White Wolf

I have seen this before in parents.  Mine personally wouldn't let any of their kids date until they were sixteen.  I personally didn't date until I turned eighteen because I was that "shy guy sitting in the corner."  I have found it a common practice among parents to not let their children date until a certain age or they are at a certain level in school.  There is really little that you can do about it.  The one thing I would suggest and I have seen it work is that you talk with her parents.  Parents only want the best for their children.  They probably won't back down from what rules or guidelines they have set up but there is often a middle ground that you and her parents can meet on.  It may be that you can only write her through snail mail once a week or once every two weeks.  If it were me that is what I would try suggesting as a middle ground.  There are several reason why this method has a good chance of working.  One is that they can monitor if you are keeping "your end of the deal" and if you do that will build trust.  Another is that it shows that you do care enough about her that you want to stay in contact with her but not go against her parents' wishes and this shows respect.  No greater things can impress parents more than a man true to his word and one that respects them as parents should be respected.  I would also recommend, that is if the letter thing works, that you keep those letters on a strictly friendship level.  One reason and the biggest reasons is that if they happen to get ahold of one of your letters you would want to have anything in there that they might feel is offensive or a "breach of contract".  I got the impression that from what you said her parents have said is that her parents don't want her "involved" with someone until after her 12th year.  This could also imply love letters.  In closing I would stress that you be honoable and true to your word or agreement with them, whatever it may end up being.  I wish you the best and if you have any further questions feel free to email me.  If you do email me put "from a fellow poet" in the subject so that I don't delete it thinking it garbage email.  I am here if you have need.


The White Wolf

If life is just a game, when does it end cause I want to get to what is real.

 
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