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shira
Member
since 12-12-2000
[First Post] 93
Hamburg, PA


0 posted 12-12-2000 12:27 PM       View Profile for shira   Email shira   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for shira

Hi everyone, I'm Shira and I'm new to the BB. I write poems, and also anime fanfiction. I'm 32 and a graphic designer from PA. I saw this forum and thought I'd stumbled across it in perfect time, for recent happenings in my life have left me needing to vent.

I recently came on hard times with my husband (we are divorcing) and stumbled across a new friend on the internet. The way I found him was uncanny - he posted a message, and his post called out to me. I emailed him and we are now best friends. We message for hours daily, talk on the phone, and he will be visiting me in the spring. Connected in a somewhat spiritual way, I think. He's been with me through all these recent hard times and I for his... relationships have been tough for both of us lately.

My friend is sick, needs a heart. He's been on a transplant list for three years now, and received news last week that his prognosis is only 6 months, despite new meds which have made him feel great. I found out about this yesterday and it has ripped my heart out. The bravery he displays toward his future is unbeleivable, and I know he is right, to live every day to its fullest, but I cant help wanting to simply dwell on the bleakness of his future. And the thought of him not being there any more. I've only known him for three months, but it feels like a lifetime... like we've known each other before.. and I am not ready to give him up, not in six more months, not in a year, or two, or more. I dont think I have ever known someone as special as he. And I seem to be mourning his loss already, from the feelings that I am having.

Well, really, that's it. I thought this looked like a nice place to vent, and I have. I'm in the midst of writing a poem about my friend, and if I can finish it, I will post it to share my feelings with all of you. Thank you for listening and I hope to get to know some of you better.

-shira.

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Laureate
since 08-30-2000
Posts 15536
San Juan, Puerto Rico


1 posted 12-12-2000 05:49 PM       View Profile for Dopey Dope   Email Dopey Dope   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dopey Dope

Good to see you have joined us here at Passions. Posting this was brave. I think it's an unfortunate situation, but one that can be beat. I do wish your friend the best of luck in all the comes to him and do hope that your first meeting experience is as wonderful as can be.




I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


2 posted 12-12-2000 08:03 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

Welcome to Passions, shira... You've come to the right place..
Broken_Winged_Angel
Senior Member
since 04-06-2000
Posts 999
Small Town, Somewhere


3 posted 12-12-2000 11:35 PM       View Profile for Broken_Winged_Angel   Email Broken_Winged_Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Broken_Winged_Angel's Home Page   View IP for Broken_Winged_Angel

Knowing you have to say goodbye isn't never easy.  I don't know if knowing what's ahead, or if not knowing and having it just happen is worse.  I've been through both and my heart goes out to you and your friend.  If you ever need someone to talk to, my icqs here.  Along with my e-mail addy.  Feel free to let me know.  
Hugs,
  BWA
    Nicole

With a little piece of tomorrow,
You'll have to kiss yesterday goodbye.
Because today won't last forever,
And the past will only make you cry.
Broken_Winged_Angel
Senior Member
since 04-06-2000
Posts 999
Small Town, Somewhere


4 posted 12-12-2000 11:37 PM       View Profile for Broken_Winged_Angel   Email Broken_Winged_Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Broken_Winged_Angel's Home Page   View IP for Broken_Winged_Angel

P.S.    Welcome to Passions.  I'm sure you'll find it very nice to let some feelings out in.  
shira
Member
since 12-12-2000
Posts 93
Hamburg, PA


5 posted 12-13-2000 11:33 AM       View Profile for shira   Email shira   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for shira

Thanks everyone for the wonderful welcome. I appreciate your kind words. And your prayers for my friend.

I did finish his poem, and I may post for you all to read.

Again, thanks!

-shira
(actually my name is Lynn, but I adopted the name shira on another ML, and it stuck so good that all my frinds call me that. You can call me whatever you wish).
White Wolf
Member
since 09-18-99
Posts 384
Somewhere in the vast wastelan


6 posted 12-13-2000 10:22 PM       View Profile for White Wolf   Email White Wolf   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for White Wolf

Shira,
     I must say that what you have posted has touched me in such a way that I cannot explain.  I would like to say that I believe and that there is hope for him.  The connection you have with him is a strong one, that dispite the distance, you can feel him next to you as if he was physically there.  I know this feeling.  Sometime I can even feel her strength keeping me from doing or even thing of doing the unthinkable.  I feel that it is this strength that can give him strength to get through this and even defy the biggest odds.  I have read stories and even heard from people about this kind of thing.  But I can truly tell you that even if he leaves this world, you will always feel him in your heart.  He can still be your strength and hope for the future.  I don't know what your beliefs are but there are a couple that I have found that talk about this kind of thing.  If you would like to talk more about it, drop me an email.  I am here if you would like to talk.  I think there is a button that will allow you to email me and it may even be in my profile.  I wish you and your friend the best with all of my heart.

The White Wolf

PS  Welcome to Passions.  I hope it helps you as much as it has me.
EagleOne
Member Elite
since 03-07-2000
Posts 2858
Between a laugh and a tear...


7 posted 12-14-2000 01:53 AM       View Profile for EagleOne   Email EagleOne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for EagleOne

Hi Shira/Lynn

Welcome to passions, you have indeed come to the right place. You will find many new friends and much support here. I look forward to reading your work, take care!

"The heart and soul have no illusion of boundries when friendship is the quest"
~ My Angel.

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 06-03-2000
Posts 9897
The Shores of Alone


8 posted 12-14-2000 07:27 AM       View Profile for catalinamoon   Email catalinamoon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit catalinamoon's Home Page   View IP for catalinamoon

Hi Shira, don't give up prematurely hon, you don't know what will be around the corner for him. And you will get tons of support here, so vent away.
Take care.
Sandra
shira
Member
since 12-12-2000
Posts 93
Hamburg, PA


9 posted 12-14-2000 08:55 AM       View Profile for shira   Email shira   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for shira

White Wolf - thank you for the welcome, and for the wonderful words. I appreciate the thoughts. I already love it here at Passions.. I hope it inspires me to write lots, because lord knows I'm overflowing with emotion these days.

and thanks again to everyone for your replies. I look forward to getting aquainted with all of you.
 
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