Elizabeth: I think you may ask yourself if you have the right to ask the question - unless you have been in that position...
You may be or may have been and if that is the case, I give you my heart and all my love....
If you haven't: let me say, when your daughter asks of her parentage, you have to make up your mind about what to say: do you say, you were the product of rape, a violent, horrendous rape that left images hard to imagine unless you have been there or do you pretend that your child was born of love and if so, where is the father?
Yes, I say father, because women don't tend to rape, we don't have the strength for that, neither do we have the ability to take, what isn't ours to have, freely....
Believe me to carry a child when the conception is that of rape...holds many misconceptions...you might dearly love the child but what if the child resembles the father?
What if the child asks of its parentage?
Believe me, the horrors of memories can be so distinct they belie belief and yet, you love this utterly, vulnerable, child, that never asked to be born, ut....it is up yo you to give this child all the love, the untold sacrifices and the memory.that your child was born of love because to do otherwise would be to inprison your child forever, without love.....
I hope to god you have never known what I am talking about and if you have then I wish you the lifetime of peace that deserves to be yours, you earnt it lady, you well and truly earnt it!
Because to be raped, is to take the very life that we, are saying deserves to live, but it's love that needs to live, it's love we need to show, encouragement, support..etc etc...
You know in many way I am thankful my daughter died before I had to answer who her father was or how violently she was conceived...
If you have never been in this position, spare a little thought, for all the love you give, against the memories, spare a thought for how the life of your child was given, hopefully with much love, much tenderness and much looking forward to the life of a child - created with love - between two people!
[This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 08-13-2000).]