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X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
Oregon

0 posted 2000-02-21 10:13 AM


I did NOT write this...but it was funny enough, and rhymed I thought ya'll might be interested!
(All you guys this is what NOT to do or say on Valentine's Day next year LOL)

Straight from L.A. (Lower Alabama)

Collards is green,
my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky
to have a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like cornsilk
a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high
when we're in a crowd.

On special occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
what I did to deserve
such a purdy, young doe.

Like a good roll of duct tape
yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants
I found in my bed.

Cut from the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up my life
more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
my life is complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
we go together
like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses
on that special day
from the cooler at Kroger.
"That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,
these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special,
you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift,
without taste nor odor,
more useful than diamonds...
IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!

Luv, from yor romeo


© Copyright 2000 Heather Walters - All Rights Reserved
Pepper
Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079
Southern Florida
1 posted 2000-02-21 02:48 PM


Yee Haw !!!!    
Good one X Angel ....

Dusk Treader
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 1187
St. Paul, MN
2 posted 2000-02-21 04:49 PM


ROFL, I love it!  I.. She's always needed a new trolling motor anyways..

 A writer's soul is on paper etched.

In flames I shall not be consumed, but reborn. --
Abrahm Simons



WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
3 posted 2000-02-21 05:19 PM


I got the same thing in my email, but under a different name.....haha
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136
Mobile, AL
4 posted 2000-02-23 01:49 AM


Umm..I know this is going to sound like attitude, and it isn't meant to be...BUT..ICK!!
This just annoys me so much and reminds me more and more of how much I HATE Mississippi and Alabama. Well..perhaps just the way some of the people are. Mind you, I said SOME!
I'm from Mississippi, and it disgusts me to hear someone talk the way this poem is worded. I know all Southerners aren't stupid, but it seems that they are in the area where I live anyway. LOL! Laters and thanks for reading my babbling.

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