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Unregistered

New Member
Posts 1

0 posted 1999-12-01 11:08 PM

I've been in a long distance with this girl for about 8 months. Recently I've come to terms with the fact that it wasn't meant to be and that I think we should break up. We've come close to it a couple of times, but each time I'm about to just tell her that we need to break up, she tells me that she can't live without me and that she'll commit suicide if I do. I don't want to stay, but I can't leave because of the fear that she'll do something to herself. Please help.

thanks

danni
Senior Member

since 1999-11-20

Posts 688
wisconsin

1 posted 1999-12-02 07:54 PM

I know this is a difficult situation and there isn't one simple answer. But at this point I would say the girl knows she has a certain control over you. I'm sure she has been in a few relationships where she has probably use this same tactic. She obviously has some issues and is putting the pressure on you to bear some of the load. It is not healthy for you to stay in this type of relationship. People have a hard enough time dealing with their own problems without having to carry and solve that of anothers. The best you can do is be gentle with her feelings and hope for the best.

I hope this helps some

Marilyn
Member Elite

since 1999-09-26

Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada

2 posted 1999-12-02 09:53 PM

You have to realize that the threat is a means of control. You also have to realize that if she does go through with it, none of that is your responsiblity. The ones that threaten generally (and I do say generally) do not go through with it.

My ex-husband threatened to kill himself if I left him. I left...he is still alive. This is manipulation at it's best, don't fall prey. Be honest with her and be clear. You will not allow yourself to be held hostage in a situation you are not comfortable with.

What I would like to know is...how old is this girl?

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