How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Discussion
 Feelings
 Internet Love - infidelity or not?
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13
Follow us on Facebook

 Moderated by: Alwye   (Admins )

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Not Available
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

Internet Love - infidelity or not?

 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
JP
Senior Member
since 05-25-99
Posts 1391
Loomis, CA


0 posted 08-04-99 01:08 PM       View Profile for JP   Email JP   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit JP's Home Page   View IP for JP

Many have "met" someone on the internet, experienced passion, 'love', joy, pain. blah blah, blah..... If you are in a marriage or relationship, is this internet love considered indidelity?
fjones
Member
since 06-07-99
Posts 101
MS


1 posted 08-04-99 02:04 PM       View Profile for fjones   Email fjones   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for fjones

Of course. IF you consider the relationship more than friendship then it is a betrayal.
Delores Hall
Member
since 07-16-99
Posts 358
USA


2 posted 08-05-99 01:08 AM       View Profile for Delores Hall   Email Delores Hall   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Delores Hall

I agree with fjones.
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


3 posted 08-05-99 07:11 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Yes. What if it were love letters, written, mailed via snail mail and read? Yes. Any infidelity 'carried out' (not just in your fantasies) is infidelity.
Lil-bit
Junior Member
since 08-03-99
Posts 29
Tallahassee, Florida


4 posted 08-05-99 08:17 AM       View Profile for Lil-bit   Email Lil-bit   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lil-bit

It is a broken trust.

Yes - it's infidelity. Remember though, it depends on a person's values. This is the crucial key to what is labeled "infidelity".


------------------
pandora
Member
since 07-26-99
Posts 253


5 posted 08-05-99 09:46 AM       View Profile for pandora   Email pandora   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for pandora

IMHO, infidelity is infidelity, despite your stated values or your chosen lifestyle. It is what it is. I would agree that an internet romance is infidelity when the person is married.
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-15-99
Posts 7276
Mobile, AL


6 posted 08-06-99 06:47 PM       View Profile for Temptress   Email Temptress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Temptress

I am going to take a different standpoint on this from my normal way. I am not a very religious person, and I do hope talk of it doesn't upset anyone. Though this is an adult place where we can surely respect each other's views as adults.

I am from Mississippi, and have been raised mostly in pentecostal churches as a small child. In the years before my teenage years, it was Assembly of God. In my older teenage years I attended Baptist churches. Through all of these it has always been taught to me that lusting after or wanting someone else (even by just mere thought) while married was indeed infidelity. Though I admit I don't attend church often anymore, I still hold these teachings true. I believe in them, but cannot say I haven't made the same mistakes. In short, I suppose I am saying, yes. I believe it is infidelity when internet "love" happens during a marriage. As for right or wrong, those are left up to the individual to decide. There are many circumstances that lead to infidelity, and EVERYTHING happens for a deeper purpose. Thanks for listening, all, and good day.
Robin
Junior Member
since 08-07-99
Posts 48
Cardiff, Wales, UK


7 posted 08-10-99 02:10 PM       View Profile for Robin   Email Robin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Robin

But how to tell when it changes from a friendship to an infidelity?
Being fascinated by a person, over the web or not, doesn't in my mind constitute an infidelity. If it did then a million friendships would be called into question, not to mention the sexual orientation of people involved in them.
The difference could tend to be the moment when secrets are being kept. That surely must be the point when infidelity starts. But it is not necessarily true that love has crept in, which I suspect most would say is the moment of infidelity since we are removing physical indiscretion to a large extent.

Then there is another point.

Being in love with someone else, does not mean you are being unfaithful to your current partner. If you do not act upon that love, or else act against it, what greater act of fidelity could be asked for?

JP
Senior Member
since 05-25-99
Posts 1391
Loomis, CA


8 posted 08-10-99 03:20 PM       View Profile for JP   Email JP   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit JP's Home Page   View IP for JP

Interesting point Robin. I've wondered about one's ability to love, love profusely and without question. If that love exists then certainly one could find themselves in love with someone other than their mate.

Is that in itself infidelity or is it the acting on that love that is considered infidelity?

[This message has been edited by JP (edited 08-10-99).]
Crystal
Member
since 07-24-99
Posts 70
Hazel Park Mi U.S.A.


9 posted 08-12-99 02:55 AM       View Profile for Crystal   Email Crystal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Crystal

I believe that loving someone other than your mate is infidelity. When you are married you should only have feelings for and want feelings for your mate. When sexual desires,(even thinking them) go beyond your "bedroom" door that is infidelity. Even when it is only words on a computer. When you do have feelings for someone other than your mate than you are betraying a trust between the two of you. Than you have to wonder what the point of getting married was in the first place.
That is what I believe.

[This message has been edited by Crystal (edited 08-12-99).]
mister61
Junior Member
since 08-12-99
Posts 43
bergen county, nj


10 posted 08-16-99 05:51 PM       View Profile for mister61   Email mister61   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for mister61

Infidelity is a relative thing. Anytime you breach the trust you have with your partner, I think that constitutes infidelity - whether sexual or emotional intimacy is involved or not. If you stray beyond the bounds of the relationship defined by you and your partner, you're cheating. By the same token, is it even possible to be guilty of infidelity in an "anything goes" relationship?
traveler
Member
since 08-17-99
Posts 122


11 posted 08-20-99 03:36 PM       View Profile for traveler   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for traveler

The woman i love dearly found another on the net ... the hurt was no less real ... i was no less crushed ... it is about commitment and trust ... do the actions under taken by one violate the other ... something i learned as a kid ... treat others as you want to be treated ... on the net or elsewhere ... meaning, if your gonna play you should walk away from the last before you start a new ...

[This message has been edited by traveler (edited 08-22-99).]
Julie
Senior Member
since 08-20-99
Posts 742
Houston, TX


12 posted 08-22-99 05:44 PM       View Profile for Julie   Email Julie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Julie

Infidelity occurs when whatever your doing cannot be shared with your significant other.
Webster's Dictionary: Unfaithfullness to a moral obligation.
GOOD RULE OF THUMB:
If in doubt, ask your spouse.

------------------
Julie
-------------------------
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
Marianne Williamson
moonmoon
Member
since 08-13-99
Posts 280
TX , USA


13 posted 08-28-99 02:34 AM       View Profile for moonmoon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for moonmoon

I guess, it all depends on the defenition of infidelity..When we get married, does that mean we are not permitted to love the others in our life? We should all be entitled to love even when we are married, as long as we know where to draw the line...
I'd have to agree with Julie on this one, if you are uncomfortable with your spouse viewing/sharing your cyber friendship, then that might qualify for infidelity..
In other words,listen to your inner voice, you'll know when you are doing something wrong..
But I wouldn't stop having good cyber friendships just 'coz I am married..!!

[This message has been edited by moonmoon (edited 08-28-99).]
 
 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Discussion >> Feelings >> Internet Love - infidelity or not? Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Not Available
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors