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Open Poetry #38
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Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia

0 posted 2006-06-25 05:34 PM


stop me if I go too fast

no, never mind
don't even try

because my winged shadow
learned to fly
the winds aloft
without your weak breezy innuendos
and when it did
it overtook the weaker body
of the me you could see
and became

something beyond your control

and then I flew so high
even Icarus was laughing
and daring me to push
the seams of the skies

and Phoenix just smiled

folded her wings in merriment

knowing

it was just
the beginning


© Copyright 2006 Kathleen Kacy Stafford - All Rights Reserved
Poetic Concept
Member
since 2006-06-25
Posts 66
God's Fingerprint
1 posted 2006-06-25 05:44 PM


I think this is good: I loved the change in mood and the Icerous comparsion, the pheonix is used too often so I dont really like that indivually but I think the mix of the dreaded, evil, powerful pheonix and soft, wise, heart-broken icerous is a superb contrast, and that kind of conparison is just beautiful...good job...elevation is the key

Return the favor on: Swear to God

"How vain it is to sit down and write when u have not stood up to live"
                     Anonymous (Unknown)

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
2 posted 2006-06-25 05:47 PM


There was an airlines that used the phrase
"fly me" or something like that....

I don't think I will...cause you certainly
are going too fast BUT...you also are
planting some nice reads before our faces.

Thanx Kacy

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
3 posted 2006-06-25 05:55 PM


"it overtook the weaker body
of the me you could see
and became

something beyond your control"

Nice write!
Liked this phrase best.
Excellent.

JL


Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed:
blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.
~Jesus Christ

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
4 posted 2006-06-25 05:57 PM


sail on silvergirl
its always been
your time

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
5 posted 2006-06-25 05:58 PM


Well, if this is the beginning you will reach untold heights with your powerful wings, dear Kacy!

I'm always charmed by any kind of flight. You lifted me up too!

Interesting too!

Love,
Margherita

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
6 posted 2006-06-25 06:25 PM


Kacy...Can I hold on to your coat strings?  
SmartChick
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown
7 posted 2006-06-25 06:26 PM


Keep on flying high.
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