YOU'VE BEEN GONE SO LONG ...

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Open Poetry #38

YOU'VE BEEN GONE SO LONG ...

shirtless
Member

since 2006-04-29

Posts 359

0 posted 2006-06-22 01:14 PM

YOU’VE BEEN GONE SO LONG
I DOUBT YOU’RE EVER COMING BACK

I have amputated
the hands
of my watch
and strapped
the moon
to my wrist

I have searched
for you
in fractal space
where no
straight lines
exist

my heart
is a broken
satellite
being pulled
to some
abyss

PLEASE VISIT MY REGULARLY UPDATED WEB SITE http://www.anthonyarmstrong.zoomshare.com

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

1 posted 2006-06-22 01:38 PM

She may be long gone, but her absence has certainly pulled some creative thoughts out of your 'poetical' mind!

P.S. This would make a great intro to a country song!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2006-06-22 01:42 PM

"I have amputated
the hands
of my watch
and strapped
the moon
to my wrist"

This elicited a huge WOW from my lips!
I love it!!!
Hugs~Nancy

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain ~

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2006-06-22 03:01 PM

ouch

nedj
Member

since 2006-06-23

Posts 87
Oregon USA

4 posted 2006-06-24 05:59 PM

I find myself wondering if the referrences to the moon, and fractals, and the satellite were fully intentional. Regardless, they work marvelously. I was especially taken by the amputated watch hands and strapping the moon to your wrist. Would that we could all write like that all the time, or should I say at will. Thanks.

A poem's just a poet in a word.

jody5
Senior Member

since 2005-12-21

Posts 876
California, U.S.A.

5 posted 2006-06-24 07:59 PM

Big Big Ouch.

Huggs Kimberly

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