"N" and "Of Daze" (Heh 2 4 the price of 1)

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Open Poetry #36

"N" and "Of Daze" (Heh 2 4 the price of 1)

Juju
Member Elite

since 2003-12-29

Posts 3429
In your dreams

0 posted 2005-07-07 11:19 PM

-This is about that guy... the one I like now... I decided to name it the first letter of his name.
"N"

I'll never ask my friend
Of the words you cannot place
For it is time we live by
and what's between us is space

No obsticals around us
But anxioty and fear
Which infect our dreams and hearts
And keeps us from being near

-Um this was when I was sick Back in mid october to late november 2004

"Of Daze"

So lonely
So lonely I fealt
Weak in spirit and body

Couldn't write
Couldn't write or type
My body could only cry

I wanted
wanted to be held
I was a woman-child

Such is this
Such to be humbled
Laying there weak and helpless

To be dazed
Dazed yet unaware
Because the heart is stronger

Juju - 1.) a magic charm or fetish 2.)Magic 3.)A taboo connected woth the use of magic

The dictionary never lies.... I am magical (;

[This message has been edited by Juju (07-08-2005 10:35 PM).]

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

1 posted 2005-07-07 11:35 PM

"I wanted
wanted to be held
I was a woman-child"

oh, but this one rings some bells
enjoyed this moment of sharing your heart

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2005-07-08 12:00 PM

Juju...m'dear...

in response to your critique? There is no reason you cannot spell...and while yes, while personally you may have a spelling problem?  Write out your poems in Word or another program that has a spell check feature, use it, and you know what?

The misspelling of your poems will not, then, be little facts that turn people off from responding to your poems.

Sometimes misspelling can be the whole reason why some folks do not respond to a good poem!

M'dear...spelling does count. So?  I am pointing it out, just as your critique indicates. But? With

As for the poem? I know what "sick" is - as you do - and it's not a fun place to be. You wrote the right of this, very well, indeed!

Juju
Member Elite

since 2003-12-29

Posts 3429
In your dreams

3 posted 2005-07-08 09:34 AM

Woops.

Yeah I thopught I DID BUT i GUES i DIDN'T. Lol. OH well I fixed it.(;

Juju - 1.) a magic charm or fetish 2.)Magic 3.)A taboo connected woth the use of magic

The dictionary never lies.... I am magical (;

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

4 posted 2005-08-21 11:28 AM

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