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Open Poetry #33
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Double Mourning (in dual voice)
| Open Poetry #33 |
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Double Mourning (in dual voice) |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass 
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Double Mourning (in dual voice) Too close, these deaths Comes death always too close, that say Jim, aged always always “so old,” too soon say Shirley, aged even when it waits “so young.” a lifetime? Oh there were reasons Every cause rings callous, that the papers gave, callow, but there is both correct, a reason, please say neither right; there is reason beyond the “long illness” too many cups of coffee of a pancreas with too many old friends, time’s counterpoint to or a raving party the “tragic accident” where even Ecstasy of a cliff. couldn’t help her fly. Now there is At least the old empty, know how to mourn; friends eye hollow. tears clash in young eyes. I remember him so well, What qualifies my father’s friend; as life-long? her not at all Will time always though my son does, trump intensity? and now I, father, I, caught between, son, mourn alike. must ache for both. |
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| © Copyright 2004 Ed Ratledge - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
very, very sad you've caught reality right smack in the middle of life, with death's grip |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
When you write these dual voices, I always find myself leaning in to hear them. Wouldn't it be wonderful, no matter the topic, to hear to voices reading these, in sync... Well done, Sir. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Ed "Comes death always too close, always always too soon even when it waits a lifetime?"  |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
Wow. This works so well. Excellent.  SusanHappiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
i ditto what Sunshine said this is .....there |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
I rode my bike up to the cemetary yesterday and spent some time dusting off the older, unkept tombs... and I was thinking of this, too. Thinking that death is always too soon. Even with the fullest and happiest, and longest of lives, death is too soon for us. The ones of us left here to mourn, that is. There's always an extra edge of pain when a child dies... but really, it's when a child mourns death, that devistation runs the deepest... Yeah, I was thinking about it, too. Thank you for this write. Always, Alyssa Poems are made by fools like me, But only God can make a tree. Joyce kilmer |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I love how you do these |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Very, very sad, RatL. So much truth. ....jo |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I've read this several times... but when I tried to pick my favorite lines, I couldn't... not without repeating the entire incredible poem(s)! When you speak twice, I listen to every whisper... this touched deeply. Superb work! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
keeping this'n too. |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Yanno dude? It's hard enough to wrote ONE daggone poem! (Mmm Hmm, makin' us all look bad, you are) |
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