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Dark Poetry #1

kiss him goodbye for me

gothicmoth
Member

since 2000-06-05

Posts 89

0 posted 2000-06-09 02:56 PM

"are ya nekkid?"
he would ask
with a slight grin
it always made me smile
that was his hello
substituted for a kiss
a smooch he'd give me
every now and then
the silence made a sound
a game of peek-a-boo
we played and played
until I turned
invisible to him

amazon_lover
Member

since 2000-04-09

Posts 491
Dublin,Ireland

1 posted 2000-06-09 05:16 PM

good game I guess...I felt a bit strange to the words u've used...needs a bit more explanation..
Sincerely
A_L

Portia
Member

since 2000-05-18

Posts 157

2 posted 2000-06-09 05:48 PM

I think the poem conveys a sense of fun, of playfulness, on the part of the speaker in the relationship by not "dressing up" the language. I like how the tone is loose and easy till the last, and even though it ends abruptly (also very effective technique), it does not beg sympathy. A very nice piece. What I got from it was that relationships don't always have to be heavy to be real.

[This message has been edited by Portia (edited 06-09-2000).]

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

3 posted 2000-06-09 07:34 PM

And in interpret it to mean that the relationship was fun and playful until it ended and then another game began..a game of hide and seek...and one was invisible.. Am I wrong?

gothicmoth
Member

since 2000-06-05

Posts 89

4 posted 2000-06-09 08:21 PM

I don't believe that any interpretations are "wrong." Different readers will be affected differently by the same poem. I'm intrigued by the strange feelings amazon_lover felt. Which words in particular?

bluebrdy65
Member

since 2000-05-16

Posts 276
Gladys,

5 posted 2000-06-10 06:59 AM

I love this poem.
A game I once played with my daughter who is now 16.
but I still get to play this game with my son but soon I will become invisible to him also.
I cant be positive what you were refering to
but to me this is what it meant,
Thanks for a lovely poem
blue

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