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Teen Poetry #7
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Kosetsu
Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 450
Alabama, USA

0 posted 2004-01-23 12:20 PM


I don’t know what I should do
Or if I’m even still in love with you
The trees are screaming out your name
But I can’t hear them…
Everything just stays the same.
Perpetually running dry,
Blood is flowing from your eyes
Like salty little crystal tears
Made from glass and ice and fears
Go away, I don’t need you
To tell me what the hell to do
Take your little porcelain dolls
I hope your little precious falls
And shatters on the ice cold ground
With a lovely shrieking sound
Take your catechisms and
Push them down into the sand
Wait until you’ve rubbed them raw,
Then submit them to your new laws.
I hope that you come to see
That you don’t mean a thing to me,
That I don’t need you
I don’t need you,
I don't need you, not at all.
I don't need to see you fall.

----------------
Just a lovely little thing that came to me while I was in the car. It's more of a song than a poem, so some of the rhymes and syllable counts seem a bit weird, but they fit with the rhythm of the tune I was thinking of.

© Copyright 2004 Adam Kamerer - All Rights Reserved
ascending_ecstasy
Member
since 2004-01-21
Posts 102

1 posted 2004-01-23 03:30 AM


I'm getting told off for critisism. so ah.... you're writing rocks!! nah i quite like it, um... yeah. good work, good work. keep it up, etc.
WinterWren
Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044
...Coming to
2 posted 2004-01-23 12:00 PM


ooh, I really like this alot. Very strong piece. Excellent job.
Thank you for sharing, this is going in my library.

W.W.
We were meant to live for so much more have we lost ourselves?
Maybe redemption has stories to tell maybe forgiveness is right where you fell.

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