That smile you gave me..convinced me I cant stay

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Teen Poetry #7

That smile you gave me..convinced me I cant stay

Sweetest Sorrow X
Member

since 2004-01-19

Posts 146
From a cradle to a casket

0 posted 2004-09-16 06:41 PM

I snuck up the stairs that led to your apartment.
I laid my things on the ground.
Luckily the wind didn't disturb anything.

Halfway through taping everything to your door, you pulled up.

Home early.

You had this look in your eyes of totally disgust and I quickly finished what I was doing.

The words I wrote across the papers I placed on your door, spelled out everything.

I clanked down your metal stairs and watched from the road.

As you ripped them all down and slammed the door.

I believe that lovers should be tied together and thrown into the ocean in the worst of weather and left there to drownin their innocence

skyshine

Member Elite

since 2002-02-07

Posts 3058
Beneath the northern stars

1 posted 2004-09-18 11:57 PM

I would't have stayed either.

~sky

So you go and make it happen
Do your best, just keep on laughing
It's all on you, there's always a brand new day. -Avril Lavigne

Lexy
Senior Member

since 2003-01-28

Posts 1038
California

2 posted 2004-09-19 05:40 PM

this is realistic.
I like it a lot

*Alli4000*

Member Elite

since 2004-03-21

Posts 3188
The World of Poetry

3 posted 2004-09-19 11:36 PM

"The words I wrote across the papers I placed on your door, spelled out everything.

I clanked down your metal stairs and watched from the road.

As you ripped them all down and slammed the door."

Liked this part best, especially the last line.

~Alli~

*:.AIM = Alli4000.:*
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened...

peachesNcream
Senior Member

since 2001-08-21

Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears

4 posted 2004-09-21 05:55 PM

This poem put me in a state of complete confusion...that's why I like it so much! Good work! ~Jess

"When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace." -Jimi Hendrix

Cinderelly
Member

since 2001-12-31

Posts 189
NM, USA

5 posted 2004-09-22 06:29 PM

I really liked this. It's a confusing situation yet one I can imagine . . . Great write!

* For all the words of tongue and pen, the saddest are those, "It might have been." *

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