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Teen Poetry #7
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young_blood
Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

0 posted 2004-07-24 08:30 PM


Beauty Lies Beneath (The Corpses)

(F)orgive me, my one, for the
(O)durate way in which I
(G)asp.
(E)very moment that never rewarded
(T)hought,
(M)anaged nothing to scream, but mouthed
(E)verything.

The moon paints the
Darkest suits on the ground
Only to dissapear at high time (staring above my head).
Audacity accompanies a
Confident night such as this.
Take my hand and get all the
Fingerprints you need,
My trial is short of evidence.
Maybe a few overpayed witnesses
Can join this absurd party,
Invite all your friends.
After you define justice,
The most silent    shot sounds,
And your trigger finger
Helps me drink in round after round.
An applause climbs from the back,
Spreading wings of a smile across my
Face.
You shout "A round for everyone!"
Hammers freeze on      ;s edge,
Waiting to strike.
The drunk and despairing will
Drink to anything.
What a mess of bleeding emotion you have to mop...
...And i'm waiting to return to the     liest smile...

© Copyright 2004 Alex Lewis - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2004-07-25 10:22 PM


"Maybe a few overpayed witnesses
Can join this absurd party"

Wo0t!!!!111oneone!

I liked that line.

Overpayed witnesses...that really brings an interesting image to mind.

I thought you wrote this very well.

Imma read more of you buddy

I left my wallet in El Segundo...
And I gotta get it
I got got to get it!

young_blood
Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN
2 posted 2004-07-27 10:09 AM


once again thanks dopey. this was just something that flowed out smoothly and most of those work well.
Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
3 posted 2004-07-27 07:01 PM


there were couple parts...that weren't typed right...and I was like: what I supposed to go there? It was frusterating, cause I really liked this piece.

"The drunk and despairing will
Drink to anything."

God. I loved that line.

young_blood
Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN
4 posted 2004-07-28 11:17 AM


ya, my computer filter took out several words, like the words g*nshot, de*th, and de*dliest.
kissa~rachelle
Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988
nowhere special
5 posted 2004-07-28 12:18 PM


Once again, i am wowed...lol

This poem did flow well, and was definetly interesting...I enjoyed it a lot.

Kissa

I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling

young_blood
Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN
6 posted 2004-07-28 03:04 PM


thanks again kissa
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