For Jessica.

Your proud white light blinds me,
The aura around you as dark silhouettes fade away within,
A hand on my shoulder burning with the heat of sanity,
No where else to look,
The awkward silence draws on and on,
Until the one I knew returns and fills the empty void,
Where have you been?
When I have been no where?
Once finishing each other’s sentences,
And making up ghosts in the toilets,
I left you, behind when I was taken,
Taken by the darkness and promise of a happy life,
Where is my childhood?
Gone, when I was going no where,
Your familiar voice echoes in a head that has no remorse,
Imperfect, like us all,
But my respect spells out jealousy,
And so I was,
Of your confidence, your popularity,
And I made up lies,
Or so I think I did,
Because our childhood days are over,
And I will them all back,
I’m trying to be honest as I write this,
The day I admired you first, J1,
Then the day you told me I was your only friend,
At least, in this class.
The Polly Pocket’s and the smelly belly’s,
The sneaking up to the dairy at lunch,
The seeking for individuality, unknown to you we both were seeking,
You were my best friend.
And in a sense, you still are,
Missing you.
Where was I?
When I was with you?
I was with you.
Where am I?
Now? As I write this? In my body? No,
With you.