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Open Poetry #30
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ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state

0 posted 2003-12-21 12:53 PM



Come ye faithful spirits to mark a special birth
rest your heads on boughs of laurel scented mirth
share tales about stoked brick layered hearths
wear trails of crimson tinted scarves...

In Eden a man was created after all was debated
plans were carefully consummated long before it dissipated
but the spirit of rebirth is still within grasp
a mark of what mankind searches for to clasp

Ideas behind a legend born of virgin blood stand tall
to make multitides believe without a whimper at his call
there are so many other saintly figures that go in and out of history
depends on political correctness of the time to balance human misery

faithful spirits arise to mark a momentous birth
children rest your weary heads on laurel scented mirth
teach your parents that enough is enough 'bout crimson laden tales
lost cause when adults are like children whose growth contines to fail...


I will light candles for some days yet
aware of a divine presence, heaven sent..
that loved ones are no longer here to witness, tis sad
faithful spirits still arise when what's around turns bad.



[This message has been edited by ecrivan (12-21-2003 01:46 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Martin Dansky - All Rights Reserved
green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx
1 posted 2003-12-21 12:54 PM


This is good so far. I'll be looking forward to the rest of it.

GIS

Application of knowledge is the basis of ability.

[If I can't have everything well then just give me a taste.]-Trent Reznor

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
2 posted 2003-12-21 12:57 PM


I do like your style -- I'll be watching to see where you go with this one.    BEEEEEwell.  
ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
3 posted 2003-12-21 01:30 AM


finished...enjoyed the work in progress too


SharaRose
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~
4 posted 2003-12-21 01:41 AM


Very nice.
Merry Christmas    
Terri~

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender...Dido

ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
5 posted 2003-12-21 01:44 AM


Thanks for sharing Shara..just polished oversome unsightly typos

[This message has been edited by ecrivan (12-21-2003 01:56 AM).]

Jes
Member
since 2003-10-21
Posts 422
Denmark
6 posted 2003-12-21 06:06 AM


Enjoyed and somehow i think i know a few like taht too.

Smile

Jes


iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
7 posted 2003-12-21 08:33 AM


ecrivan -- interesting thoughts and sentiments....I like!    BEEEEEwell.  Catch you later.
ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
8 posted 2003-12-21 09:23 AM


Faith and spirit mark us at the heart dear Martin, and carry with us through what life offers.  Enjoyed this poem very much.
With each candle, I wish you peace...and as you light them, may they burn eternal.
TD

ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
9 posted 2003-12-21 10:09 AM


Thanks Jes, Kathleen

It's Hannukah time and that's where the candles come in...like the double sense to the first line of the last stanza taken in context to the theme.


Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
10 posted 2003-12-21 10:29 AM


ecrivan
An excellent write and happy Hannukah.

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