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icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

0 posted 2003-11-16 08:21 AM

In the soft twilight before dawn
with the world around me sleeping
I sift through the choices
and the options gone
and marvel at the ones
I am still keeping.

It may all link to dying
in a convoluted way,
I had no expectations of living ‘til today;
you said you'd care for me
when I get sick
if I would let you stay;
I still can't bend my mind
around that thought in any way,
but the coffee's hot
and the air is crisp,
my brother Crow just called to me.

I drifted for a moment,
to a sunrise
on a day before you were born,
the smell of death up close
never really goes away;
if I had failed that day
so long ago
whose world would this one be.

You asked about the early days
and being me
I dodged,
just because by loving you
I hide some things you shouldn't know;
when you pressed on,
insistent,
and asked if I had killed
back in my youth,
I watched your eyes change
your lids fluttered at the truth,
perhaps I should have lied
and denied the life I chose,
but I don't apologize;
we did change the world on purpose.
For the better?
No one knows.

©2003 by icebox

EvocativeVerse2
Senior Member

since 2003-09-10

Posts 1279

1 posted 2003-11-16 08:35 AM

Oh wow! This is an amazing piece of writing. It is so well penned it makes me want to read more. Well done! Bravo!

Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history!

Patricia
Member Elite

since 2003-04-06

Posts 2160
Missouri

2 posted 2003-11-16 08:49 AM

You have written beautifully in this piece...and yes, I do wish for more, as well.

You know you make me wonder if the truth does always set us free.

Patricia

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

3 posted 2003-11-16 08:59 AM

icebox,
Could not have said it better myself.
Well done.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

4 posted 2003-11-16 09:03 AM

I watched your eyes change
your lids fluttered at the truth,
perhaps I should have lied
and denied the life I chose,
but I don't apologize;
we did change the world on purpose.
For the better?

Sometimes the truth is hard to swallow and although it may come out and surprise one,
it is what makes understanding another easier.

M

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

5 posted 2003-11-17 02:56 PM

"I drifted for a moment,
to a sunrise
on a day before you were born,
the smell of death up close
never really goes away;
if I had failed that day
so long ago
whose world would this one be"

Icy...

Some things are better left unanswered..

"if you won't let me fall for you
then you won't see the best that I would love to do for you"
~Dido~

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

6 posted 2003-11-17 09:07 PM

I hesitate to use the words "desultory," "rhetoric" and "icebox" in the same sentence -- could be struck by lightning!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

7 posted 2003-11-17 09:15 PM

I could feel the ache of truth in this one. Sometimes we want to lie and can't, for to do so might make our own existence an untruth.

[This message has been edited by Midnitesun (11-17-2003 09:15 PM).]

wandering glider
Senior Member

since 2001-04-04

Posts 501
aloft

8 posted 2003-11-17 11:29 PM

Playing around with the truth is a "dusty" business . . .
but we do it all the time.

-glider-

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