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Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

0 posted 2002-12-21 05:25 PM

Santa Claus is old and fat..
He wears outrageous clothes.
He drinks so much he has red spotches
On his cheeks and nose!

He counts on deer to guide the way
And cover up his flaws.
It seems to me
A certainty....
TOERAG is Santa Claus!!!!

[This message has been edited by Balladeer (12-21-2002 05:29 PM).]

The Lonely Stranger
Member

since 1999-06-18

Posts 361
Upstate, NY, USA

1 posted 2002-12-21 05:31 PM

OUCH .....is Toe bleeding ??? 'cause he just got tagged !!

... and they sent him home happy ... one hundred percent.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

2 posted 2002-12-21 05:32 PM

This explains so much to me.
I'd bake him cookies for a treat.
I found them all, still on the plate--
no he did not even taste--

The only thing that disappeared?
Was my stash and all my beer!

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

3 posted 2002-12-21 05:37 PM

LOL...Yep, must be Toe. (Though, I took your stash, Sen)

Justin Genius
Member

since 2001-04-02

Posts 85

4 posted 2002-12-21 05:41 PM

Now Toerag it can't be, 'cause we have locked him up real good,
but then again our Keeper does just anything for food.
I think I best inspect his cage, 'cause Toerag on the loose,
Might end up with a BBQ - Main course? Our Doctor Moose!

Merry Christmas to you Balladeer!

[This message has been edited by Justin Genius (12-21-2002 05:43 PM).]

SmartChick
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-09-23

Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown

5 posted 2002-12-21 05:42 PM

This is so cute. I love it.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

6 posted 2002-12-21 05:52 PM

The truth ALWAYS outs!
Very good, Balladeer!

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

7 posted 2002-12-21 05:55 PM

Balladeer - goodness, you know what? I never thought of that, but I think you discovered something! Could it be? Could Toerag be Santa Claus? Could he????

BC

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

8 posted 2002-12-21 08:41 PM

Lonely Stranger...LOL! Nothing smarts like a bloody Toe!

Serenity..That's Toe, all right...only man alive who would not take your offered cookies!!

Duncan...AHA! I knew there was a worthwhile villain behind those smooth words!!

Justin Genious..bbq'd moose?

Well, better that than venison..Merry Christmas back atcha!!

SmartChick..ALWAYS happy to see you stop by!

Sunshine..yep, the truth can only be hidden as long as it's not seen but the minute it's seen it's not hidden any more!!!

Bill...could it be? Well, I took this little video of Santa while he wasn't looking. Who else would do that but Toerag???

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

9 posted 2002-12-21 09:16 PM

Balladeer, this is precious. Thank you for the laughs.

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant

since 2001-05-07

Posts 5182
Netherlands

10 posted 2002-12-21 09:35 PM

LOL I always knew there was something fishy about Santa Claus, mmmmm... I'd rather stick to my Sinterklaas, but...come to think of it....he sure reminds me of you Deer

Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

[This message has been edited by Titia Geertman (12-21-2002 09:36 PM).]

enchantingvamp
Member

since 2002-12-21

Posts 214
Indiana, & NO there is NOT more than corn in Indiana, oughta go back to texas!

11 posted 2002-12-21 10:29 PM

this was too funny.....i'm going to admit to have a very irrational fear of santa.....ever since i saw that movie as a child " a christmas story " where santa uses a boot to the head to kick that kid down the slide.....i keep thinkin " well if thats what that little kid got ( and i cant imagine him being so bad ) i dont want to chance finding out what santa would do to me lol!

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

12 posted 2002-12-21 10:41 PM

(giggles in delight) Oh my gosh, can this be true, Toerag, you confess immediately! LOL! (smiles) Hard to say if we can jump to conclusions so soon, guess we have to take off his shoe to find out, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Balladeer, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

13 posted 2002-12-22 06:31 AM

ROFL...ah, I've always wanted to know the truth

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

14 posted 2002-12-22 12:33 PM

I love it!

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Andrew Scott
Member Elite

since 1999-06-24

Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA

15 posted 2002-12-23 02:22 AM

NO WONDER Santa scares the day lights out of my kids! Thanks for the laugh. Peace to you and yours.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

16 posted 2002-12-23 02:23 AM

hehehehe....thanks for the giggle.

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

17 posted 2002-12-23 06:46 AM

Well Ho Ho Ho..we all know
Who ain't gettin nuthin for Christmas this year....!!!!!!!!!!!!! Besides, anyone knows that I can't be Santa just from that picture of Santa peeing in the snow?....I only pee in Old English!

[This message has been edited by Toerag (12-23-2002 08:16 AM).]

Marsha

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-10

Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England

18 posted 2002-12-23 08:35 AM

‘Deer dearest heart this has to be the funniest Santa I’ve seen, thank you a giggle and a laugh is always welcome.

Happy Christmas my visits in here are fleeting and rare, but I know why I still put my head around the door, it is to read and see real quality, which you never fail to deliver.

Having said that can I have Muffy please? It wouldn’t seem Christmas without her, and I need all the Christmas spirit I can get.

Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy

Breathe through the heat of our desire
Thy coolness and they balm
Let sense be dumb let flesh retire
Speak through the earthquake wind and fire

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

19 posted 2002-12-23 09:15 AM

Now, this story isn't true
Though it's a catchy rhyme...
Santa gives gifts but once a year
Toe's giving all the time!
His great big heart just overflows
(As does his razor wit)
I'm thankful that he is my friend,
Admire him as a poet.
His gifts are laughter, compassion,
Incredible integrity...
Sorry, Bal, your guess is wrong -
I know Toe... this can't be!!!

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

20 posted 2002-12-23 09:30 AM

Mike,
The only time I saw toe look like Santa clause was when I stubbed it on a brick wall. Enjoyed

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

21 posted 2002-12-23 01:08 PM

ROTFL. You guys never cease and desist.
But laughter is healthy, even for a stubbed toe.

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