navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Stole
Teen Poetry #6
Post A Reply Post New Topic Stole Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
snoduck
Member
since 2002-11-15
Posts 99
Selah, WA

0 posted 2002-11-25 08:18 PM


I'm tryin to make sense
Of everything you said
Fighting back the tears
I don't want to remember
But I don't want to forget
I'd like to keep
The beautiful image I
Once held for you
You'll never feel the same
You never have
I scared before, but
Now I'm terrified
And even worse
I'm alone
No number of "I'm sorry's"
Will ever make things
Right between us
To me you were everything
My rain in the spring
My snow in the winter
My flowers in the summer
And my beautiful scenery
That came during fall
To you I was nothing
You had no room
In your busy schedule
For a nobody like me
I let myself love you
Not resisting the feeling
That was so new to me
You took that away, and
Ran like the wind
Only to have all the veins
That held my heart
In my chest
Break, and snap
Here and there
The blood would spatter
My images would fade
Soon in your mind
While yours lasted, and
Continued to linger
Endlessly
Oh but this
This is just a short list
Of all the things
You stole from me

© Copyright 2002 Erica Reeves - All Rights Reserved
PrincessNets
Member
since 2002-10-30
Posts 103
NewYork, USA
1 posted 2002-11-25 08:25 PM


Very well written.  You got your feelings across wonderfully! I enjoyed this poem and hope to see more from you!

-Jeanette-

xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
2 posted 2002-11-25 11:37 PM


Oh hun...: :...im sorry to hear all of this...this will look brighter eventually just give it some time. You expressed your emotions and sadness well in this piece...keep on writing and get those emotions out

Standing on the edge of the world
Now I don’t want you to catch me
I want you to let me
Stand up here and walk on my own

knightlyshadows
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791
obscured vision
3 posted 2002-11-26 07:46 AM


indeed, you wrote this well. lots of emotion in this piece. i especially liked the last line and how you incorporated it with the title and everything else in the poem. this was my fav bit:
quote:
My images would fade
Soon in your mind
While yours lasted, and
Continued to linger
Endlessly

good write.

“A single choice can build destinies, or destroy them.”

Getting away, isn't Running away.

"The hurt that you try to hide, is killing me."

punkrockerrobin
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180
Sparks, NV
4 posted 2002-11-26 10:33 PM


hey there, this isnt robin.. its her friend sarah but i really liked your poem. just wanted to let you know that and i hope you have a great night. love, sarah
hobbs2006
New Member
since 2002-11-26
Posts 1
Kansas, USA
5 posted 2002-11-26 11:00 PM


WOW. THis is an awsome poem. Wonderfully written. You showed so much deepth. Things will always look brighter in so many ways. I'm still shocked at how well written your poem is.

All I am is me. Whether you like me or not I'm not changing. So get over yourself you cannot rule my world. I do the best I can whether it makes you h

palmerj
Junior Member
since 2002-11-06
Posts 30
Coxsackie, NY
6 posted 2002-11-27 01:46 AM


This poem holds a place in my heart cause Ive been there and it isn't a pretty place to be =(  But eventually the anger and depression will pass once you realize there are others that deserve your love and won't take advantage of it.  Goodluck

Jay

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Stole

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary