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dizzyblondeme
Junior Member

since 2003-08-27

Posts 11
NE, England

0 posted 2003-08-29 12:33 PM

I wrote this after my friend was discharged from hospital after taking an overdose last year. I think she's improving now although she doesn't talk about it.

I know you're upset
That you're hurting inside
Why won't you let me help
A thousand times I've tried

You wont pick up your phone
Or return my calls
I'm sitting here crying
Staring at these four walls

I've got to know what you're doing
I need to know you're safe
I hate you being on your own
Alone in this place

Can't you see I'm worried
Don't you know I'm scared
I'm petrified you're hurting
That the pain might have flared

You mean the world to me
Just let me what to do
I want to help you cope
Please, just let me help you

You say you can trust no one
But you can trust in me
When you think the world's at its end
Just look and there I'll be

I want to understand it
When you just want to die
You've got so much going for you
I just can't understand, Why?

XxXx J xXxX

*Belabebeautiful*

Senior Member

since 2003-01-03

Posts 696
washington, USA

1 posted 2003-08-29 06:30 PM

Very moving piece. I too know what it is like to watch someone you care about and want to help yet at the same time feel helpless because you don't understand the problem and they won't talk to you! Most frusterating!! You displayed that very well, a nice use of emotions throughout the piece and you did a good job at displaying confusion without the poem being confused..if that makes any sense! Overall Lovely write
~Live and Laugh~

The problem with resisting temptation is you never know if you'll get the chance again
~Bella~

Jaime

Registered

Member
Posts 250

2 posted 2003-08-29 11:55 PM

As being the one normally not returning the phone calls, popping the pills, and hiding my scars - this poem was an interesting twist on perspective. The thing is that she is/was probably asking herself the same thing... why?

This was a good poem... expressive, nice flow. (Sometimes we just need two arms.)

jupiter.

the faeries creep into my hair at night leaving it in terrible knots

Manth88
Junior Member

since 2003-06-15

Posts 45
IL, USA

3 posted 2003-08-31 12:23 PM

Hey I like your poem, I also have a friend who has that problem. I care about her alot and she just doesn't understand. I like the poem b/c it is mutual to my feelings also.
So great write hope to see more great poems.

!^*Manth88*^!

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