A Girl Falling Out of the Sky

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Open Poetry #25

A Girl Falling Out of the Sky

GoldenIllusions111
Junior Member

since 2003-02-25

Posts 18

0 posted 2003-02-27 12:53 PM

Like a bruise she falls
all forward and hard
into blending chimes backward
and cutting new teeth
she drives,
drives
and drives
dancing concrete floors
and red engine cars
with doors open
and dancing,
dancing
arms and arms
pull tight
jet black hair, black
his hair, black, full
open just open
like French doors
and gold books.

Golden*

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

1 posted 2003-02-27 12:56 PM

(smiles) Oh Charlotte, I just love the imagery in this, sweet friend, I love French doors and this vision truly did touch me, at first it scared me to see the girl falling but then the end seemed more golden! (big hugggsssss) This is wonderful, sweet friend, you have my golden vote, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

GoldenIllusions111
Junior Member

since 2003-02-25

Posts 18

2 posted 2003-02-27 03:03 PM

Noah
The poem is about a girl just beginning her life again. Maybe the metaphor is to obscure. Thank you again kind sir.

Golden*

Ericc
Member Elite

since 2003-01-31

Posts 4178

3 posted 2003-02-28 04:03 PM

This is really beautiful.
Eric

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

4 posted 2003-02-28 04:10 PM

Enjoyed...James

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

5 posted 2003-02-28 04:14 PM

And the new teeth were cut in a most interesting fashion!

Warm hugs,
Earth Angel

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

6 posted 2003-02-28 04:30 PM

Nice write....

Sunkissed
Senior Member

since 2002-12-03

Posts 610

7 posted 2003-02-28 05:13 PM

There's much power in this poem.

Enjoyed reading!

Sunkissed.

"I have to hurry past the moon...to Jupiter..."

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