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Open Poetry #25
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Brad Majors
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since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647
Georgia

0 posted 2003-03-10 03:57 PM




You are the forbidden swan
who has swum into my lake
the waters of my life
which once held waves of turmoil
now remain still and calm
in your presence
as your wings glide on the water
I feel you beauty
touch my intermost being
and wish for a love
that can never be
for you are the graceful swan
so beautiful your form
so perfect your movement on the water
that at times I forget everything
my problems
worries
and start to enter the water
to swim to you
then I see my reflection
and retreat into the solitude
of loneliness
for you are too beautiful for me
and if the most gallant swan
is unworthy
then what of me
for I am just a lonely creature
hiding in the darkness
so scold me not
for loving you from my shadow
for it is all I can
in a love never ment to be
and where there is no tommorow.

© Copyright 2003 Dan Mauro - All Rights Reserved
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
1 posted 2003-03-10 04:43 PM


Okay, here is what I think, first, great analogy, loved it as a matter of fact.  

Second, here is my thoughts and god knows there are plenty of us females out there that sport the hurt of a "pretty boy"...(I just know someone is going to get a bit ticked off here, but what the hell..)..give me that ugly, lonely, whatever and if he treats me right I am going to cherish him forever.  Pretty boys tend to spend forever making sure they don't miss out on something better.....not that I am bitter or anything...

(kiss) (I know you are down today)

Susan

[This message has been edited by Susan Caldwell (03-10-2003 04:52 PM).]

Ericc
Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178

2 posted 2003-03-10 05:13 PM


Beautiful words...full of longing.
Eric

Brad Majors
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3 posted 2003-03-10 05:13 PM


thank you
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
4 posted 2003-03-10 06:01 PM


Beautiful poem.
When you SEE the beauty you are well WORTH of it!
Reach out!
Margherita

Connel
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Senior Member
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736
Florida, USA
5 posted 2003-03-10 06:07 PM


SOOOOOO BOOOOOOTIFUL! Loved the way you use you words, so unique!

Read ^ there, because you are reading the wrong part!

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
6 posted 2003-03-12 07:02 AM


enjoy the fantasy for whatever
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
7 posted 2003-03-12 07:28 AM


Very nice in depth poetic ramble. Cleverly concieved thoughts.
garysgirl
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since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
8 posted 2003-03-12 07:49 AM


Brad, you never know what she's going to think and feel about you if you don't make an effort.

Sometimes the best looking people miss out on a lot because others think they don't have a chance, when in reality they may very well have more than a chance. So, just try.

hugs,
Ethel

Brad Majors
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since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647
Georgia
9 posted 2003-03-12 09:21 AM


thank you
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