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Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

0 posted 2001-11-26 09:55 PM

Dream or Premonition

It is a late summer evening
with the fresh washed smell
of new rain still hanging in the air

The sun is warm
as it soaks up the remaining
drops left over from
the recent sun shower

He has finally finished
his work for the day
and what hasn’t been done
can be picked up tomorrow

For now he wants to relax
in the quiet surroundings
of his home, set near the forest
without the disturbing
presence of neighbors

As he leans back,
in his hammock,
strung between
two stately trees,
he surveys the peaceful beauty
leading to the unmarked
forest behind him

Placing hands behind his head
and letting his gaze follow
the line of the trees
he marvels
at the blueness of the sky
with just a few fluffy white
clouds floating by

He closes his eyes
for a minute and breathes deeply
of the sent of pine,
earth and fresh rain

Even as part of him rejoices
in the serene beauty
of it all, he feels the loneliness
of no one to share
this tranquil scene with

Eyes still closed
his senses pick up a sound
that increases
with its persistence

Opening his eyes
and looking about for the direction
of the sound, that now
has become annoying,
he spots a large black cat
sitting close by
watching and demanding
his attention

He calls out to it
to no avail so he tries to return
to his pleasant pastime,
although he is slightly curious
about where this strange cat
came from

The cat would not be deterred
from his mission
as he continued his
loud caterwauling
to get the man’s attention

Deciding the only way
to be able to return to his rest
he leaves his hammock
and approaches the cat asking
it what the problem was

Once he is on his feet
the cat takes off, at a run,
towards the forest,
stopping at intervals
to renew his racket

He has heard of dogs
doing this kind of thing
when wanting someone to follow them
but the idea that a cat would
be as intelligent
was too amazing to accept

Nevertheless, he follows the cat
into the forest,
never quite loosing sight
of him, as the cat leads the way,
halting frequently,
with what appear to be
impatient looks on his face

As they moved deeper still
into the now darkening forest
he notices
that the path, being traveled,
is no longer familiar

Suddenly loosing sight of the cat
as it went around a bend
he increases his pace,
to come to an abrupt halt
as he rounds the bend

He becomes transfixed
as all his senses become alert
to the indescribable beauty before him

Right before him
is a large meadow
covered with the thickest,
greenest, grass,
sprinkled through
with a myriad of multicolored
wildflowers all bathed
in perfect evening sunlight

Standing in the middle
of this meadow
with the black cat
circling her legs
stands a beautiful woman gazing
at him with soft brown eyes

Her hair was chestnut
falling in gentle waves
past her shoulders, framing a face
showing a small hesitant smile

Her gown is the lightest green,
falling smoothly to her ankles
as it clings lightly
to her perfect figure,
blending with the grass at her feet

His heart begins to beat
faster as he gazes
upon this lovely vision
of nature and womanhood

He closes his eyes,
takes a deep gulp of sweet air
as he tries to calm
his thundering heart

And opens them,
with a start hearing
a persistent noise
that drives him from
his hammock to see
a black cat calling to him

Karen Torbiak©

Elizabeth

Moderator

Member Ascendant

since 1999-06-07

Posts 6871
Minnesota

1 posted 2001-11-26 10:06 PM

Wow! What a story, Karen. Are you going to do a sequel to it! I'd like to see what happens next. Very well done!

God bless America, my home sweet home.

Amused Cupid
Junior Member

since 2001-10-24

Posts 40

2 posted 2001-11-26 10:29 PM

This is fabulous, I was imagining all the beauty of nature that you drew so creatively within this wonderful poem.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

3 posted 2001-11-26 10:38 PM

WOW!! Karen you are a wonderful story teller as well! This is more than good....it is terrific!
Enjoyed, hugs, Nancy.

~Time has cast a spell on you,
So you won't ever forget me~

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

4 posted 2001-11-26 10:47 PM

Interesting writing...James

RosePetal

Member Elite

since 2001-08-26

Posts 2985
South Florida

5 posted 2001-11-26 11:03 PM

Awesome Karen, you have my attention!
ENCORE, ENCORE!!

Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

6 posted 2001-11-26 11:09 PM

Elizabeth...thank you so very much. There is no sequel but I do love to weave visions. I might think about posting my Dream Weaver Series here but they are long like this one. **hugs**

Amused Cupid...Thank you so much....I do love to use lots of words to bring the vision of what I am seeing alive. I am so glad you like it. **hugs**

Nancy...Oh yes, I can weave some quite magical tales. They are called Dream Weavers. **hugs** I am so glad you liked this.

James...How would you have liked it to end, sweet man? **hug**

RosePetal...*giggling* I am glad it didn't put you to sleep...these writings of mine can be pretty long. **hugs**

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

7 posted 2001-11-26 11:31 PM

I Iike, I also must reread in the AM
eyes are getting hazy.
happy dreams
Sandra

Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

8 posted 2001-11-26 11:47 PM

more MORE More!!! Karen Sweet dreams....enjoy your words...

Greeneyes~

[This message has been edited by Greeneyes (edited 11-27-2001).]

A Whisper's Caress
Senior Member

since 2000-11-03

Posts 791
on the horizon of a fairytale

9 posted 2001-11-27 12:04 PM

so much to hold the reader.
I always fear trying such a long piece,
but you did this very well.

ever deep...runs
the wishing well
for fairytale illusions

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

10 posted 2001-11-27 12:57 PM

I've got the black cat, two of them in fact, perhaps I should secure myself a hammock. Beautiful, fairytale feel to this!

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

11 posted 2001-11-27 06:01 AM

Duncan's response made me smile..this was a nicely woven dream...

~Wynter

"For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart.
It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul."
(J.Garland)

Tracey
Member Elite

since 2001-08-29

Posts 2808
where insanity meets breeding

12 posted 2001-11-27 07:23 AM

What an enchanting story Karen. I love the ending to this. No sequel?? That’s okay, I can make up my own continuation, as he finds the woman in real life, and they live happily ever after. For, as Duncan says, this is like a fairytale, and fairytales always have happy endings.

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

Mon Cherie

Senior Member

since 2001-10-31

Posts 922
Land of Never-ending Summers

13 posted 2001-11-27 12:02 PM

Wow... Let's hope that was a premonition... I really liked the imagery of the meadow with multi-coloured flowers spread across it... So beautiful!

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

14 posted 2001-11-27 12:09 PM

What a nice story. I don't usually read long pieces but I could not tear my eyes away form this enthralling tale.

1derful piece

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

15 posted 2001-11-27 12:27 PM

Sandra...It's it wonderful to get lost in fantasies like this once in a while. **hugs**I am so very glad you enjoyed it.

Greeneyes...Thank you,so much. I do have many more like this. The two are long and I will post one every so often. I am so very glad you liked it. **hugs**

A Whispers Caress...I love to write these visions. When I see them there is so much detail that I want everyone to see them so I tend to go on and on. I am glad you enjoyed it and were not bored. **hugs**

Duncon...*sigh* this one was actually inspired by my black cat. I just couldn't resist weaving a tale around him and his personality. I am glad you liked this little fairy tale. **hugs**

Wynter...everyone needs to lose themselves in dreams like this once in a while. I have a tendency to dream them a lot. Thank you for enjoying this poem.**hug**

Tracey...*giggling* Good plan then everyone can put their own ending on it and it will always end happily. **hugs**

Mon Cherie...That is the way that I see it too, as a premonition. I am so happy you liked it. **hugs**

Interloper...WOW!! I know you don't like long pieces and I didn't expect you to read this one. I am trilled that you not only read it but liked it. **hugs**

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

Charisma

Member Ascendant

since 2000-09-30

Posts 5906
lost in blue pages

16 posted 2001-11-28 04:57 PM

*Wow* what a story, love the vision you present here, Love it a lot!!!

sigheyes
Member

since 2001-04-25

Posts 323
the winds of destiny

17 posted 2001-11-28 04:59 PM

A wonderful write Karen. I enjoy your words. *s*

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