»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #17
»
please help me with a title
| Open Poetry #17 |
|
please help me with a title |
|
|
aries_luv_ppl Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448Universal Mind 
|
When the cloth softly fell on your head, I saw your lovely smile; A smile you've had for twenty years Yet the reflection of youth was gone. I gently touched your face. It was flat as paper could; Now it was an embossed glass. Whatever faults you might have, It would never take away your goodness. As I was reading a book to you, I was sadden for my faults. A paper as smooth as yours Should have been taken care, Yet I was but a young fool Who was too stubborn to hear advice. Advice which was dear for me As lessons followed my steps. I was frightened by your leave; Whatever could delay it happen I would try. I must confess my feeling Before you went. All I hope was your comfort; Forgive or not I did not care. Though I had the answer in my heart For I knew the mother's heart. //Just how often we don't say what our heart want to say until it's too late. Just how often we don't know how to cherish the present. Some may not know how lucky they are to have parents until they are gone. Love, Lizzy http://poets2000.com/lizzyvivian/ ~The first two cup of tea is to throw away; what remains is the best of all. ~Blessed are those who find ordinary things extraordinary. [This message has been edited by aries_luv_ppl (edited 11-17-2001).] |
||
| © Copyright 2001 Eliza Simmons - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I know this pain of regret and loss and found this very moving---I have no hope of doing this justice with a title, except a simple offering of "The Common Tears of Those Left Behind" "hugs" truly moving |
||
|
Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
How about "Until Their Gone" I know just what you mean. This poem touched my heart. It is very well written. **hugs** Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
||
|
ctowen Member Elite
since 2001-10-18
Posts 2286Green Mountains of VT |
A piece deserving of a title but would only be fitting from your own heart. Perhaps "Undying Word", that would be my suggestion to these heartfelt words. We always have too much left unsaid. |
||
|
Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
This is a sad one. I know the pain of losing a parent. It's an ache that never lets go no matter what. So well said. My title suggestion would be...Lessons Learned...for they teach us many even though we are not yet ready to receive them. All writing comes |
||
Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I think all to often the fear and sense of loss in death prevents us from really saying what is truly in our heart, but those leaving us know it! I can identify with you as I was right there when my Mother died and I never got to say what I really felt, as words had been strained between us through the years. I would like to suggest this title for your lovely poem and hope your spirit and heart heal soon. "A Book Read So Many Words Unsaid" ~*~ Carpe' Diem ~*~ [This message has been edited by Mysteria (edited 11-17-2001).] |
||
|
aries_luv_ppl Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448Universal Mind |
thanks for all suggestions. For now I'll put Undying Word for title. But if someone has some other suggestion. Or maybe a vote of the current suggested title would be a great help. My mind is not decided ~The first two cup of tea is to throw away; what remains is the best of all. |
||
|
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice writing...I suggest "The Pain of Losing a Loved One." James |
||
|
aries_luv_ppl Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448Universal Mind |
thanks Mysteria and other who has posted. I like the title A Book Read So Many Words Unsaid. So far anyway. Keep going. Yours &c. |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
