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Teen Poetry #5

strawberry cheesecake

quietlydying

Senior Member

since 2001-06-10

Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

0 posted 2002-03-24 02:12 AM

Straight at eyesight,
drowning in that deep
                                      brown
                                                sea.

‘Won’t happen again’
you     Swear.
And swear.

‘I love you’.

Come on, feed me some more...

The fake wood of the table
chipped
and stained.

I make love to
to the water spots on
my dull, warped
ForK.

I never knew strawberry cheesecake to
taste so bitter.

/jen/

so foul and fair a day i have not seen. - macbeth act 1, scene 3

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

1 posted 2002-03-24 02:56 AM

I know there's a deeper meaning in this somewhere, but I'm just too tired to find it. Jen you don't need a guy. If he's feeding you lines, lose him. *hugs*

Hopelessly in love

Barelybreathing
Junior Member

since 2000-04-26

Posts 46

2 posted 2002-03-27 02:34 AM

hey I thought this was really good. I loved the way you wrote it. Thanks for sharing.

'The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own.'
~Montaigne~

keoni
Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC

3 posted 2002-03-27 12:18 PM

I read this the other day and I didn't reply. I couldn't get nothing out of the poem. I read it today though and it took on form. Very obscure way to describe this, but once I understood it I really, really enjoyed it.
Jon

"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur
"Sometimes it takes a painful loss to realize you are free"- Bouncing Souls

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

4 posted 2002-03-27 06:09 PM

i was lucky enough to get the full meaning behind this after the first time reading it and i loved it!!! Amazing job...loved it!!

iTs bEeN 1 Of ThOsE dAyZ 4 2 MaNY dAyZ nOw..I jUst NeEd a DaY whErE tHe WOrLd cAn tAkE cArE of ItsElf..

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