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Teen Poetry #5
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It should have been me not you
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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It should have been me not you |
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Kicking Kim Member
since 2001-04-16
Posts 426Cloud Cucko Land! |
You were the one who held the shame, I was the one who played the game. You were the one with the consequence, whilst I was the one who jumped the fence. ^*~*^ Never did you tell the truth My lies were enough to cave in your roof. You were the one, branded a liar but I was the one who lit the fire. ^*~*^ You were the one with your tale untold I was the one with my story sold. Never in your life did you do anything to fail, yet its me who lives to tell the tale. ^*~*^ How innocence should be your middle name and guilt is the only thing in me to remain. you'll never know I was your biggest fan, and never hear me tell you how sorry I am. "Theres no posession, just obsession and growing depression" |
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| © Copyright 2001 Kimberley Mason - All Rights Reserved | |||
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TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
Your poem is very sad and I can really relate to what you are saying in it.My friend was killed in a car accident 2 years ago and I was supposed to be in the car sitting where he was so it really should have been me.But anyway great poem and keep up the awsome work. Lauren |
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Kicking Kim Member
since 2001-04-16
Posts 426Cloud Cucko Land! |
I am glad that you found it easy to relate to my poem Lauren, unfortunately I am sorry that it has to be in such circumstances. I hope you will get over it someday. Thanks ^*~Kicking Kim~*^ "Theres no posession, just obsession and growing depression" |
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~sugarpie313~ Member
since 2000-09-14
Posts 375Maine, USA |
this was a very good poem. i relate very well... my aunt died in the hospital and i left to come home and on my way home i found out later she died. if i had just stayed i would of gotten to say good bye. but anyway... enuf about me. LOL great job. Valerie "...And i want to take you down, but your soul could not be found, doesn't matter much you see cause your disease is killing me..." -Saliva |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
This is really sad... I think pretty much everybody will find a way to relate to this somehow. ( 2 Examples just above me.) Wonderful read Kim. |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
This poem is so heart wrenching, Kim. *hugs* Things like this happen... and it's by no means your fault. The tecnical side of this poem is awesome. The flow is VERY well done. The meter is right on... I really enjoyed the read. I'm sorry this happened... stay strong. --Marie You can’t expect the roses to grow without the weeds. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I really liked this one. You did awesome here! I thought this poem was a very honest one. Like, even though this other person was some how labeled to be something he/she wasn't.....you were, in a way, in the clear but felt horrible for being there. Oh well, that's what I saw hehe. Nicely done.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
sad...very sincere emotions were put here...i hope things get better for you. im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you? |
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Marshalzu 
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
I liked this immensely, I dunno I thought it was part confession sort of trying to get the weight off your chest... anyway I was very impressed, great job. Zu "Here we are again finding ourselves at the end Of the wrong stick I guess it's far too late I'm building up the barricades In my head" -My Vitriol |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
This was a wonderful poem. I dont believe I have been in the same situation and felt this way, but I am sure I do not want to be. I hope that this is resolved by now. If not, *hugz* *Amanda* |
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Jose Marti Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 374washing DC |
how exactly did your friends deat relate to a lie that was told? |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Very expressive poem. I do hope you correct what is wrong. Thanks for sharing hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Mare |
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Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
Great poem, horrible situation. It's great you wrote something like this, even if they can't read it.. Bel |
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