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| Dark Poetry #3 |
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today |
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carolinadreams Member
since 2000-07-20
Posts 142 |
so who are they why are they in every move we pepsi Jhonson&SoN free world George W. George Bush CIA ONE WORLD GOVERNMENT Phizer NBA(Salary, disease, rap, killings, kids), MLB(Salary, ego, disease, PETE ROSE, chewing, kids, salary cap, family, DH), NFL(Salary cap, kids, retirement, 32, family, USFL, acting, announcing, coaching, CFL), NCAA(corruption), MLS(Salary,longevity), NHL(Salary, disease, kids, salary cap, ice, playing, family)Local softball(usually pick from any above, but make sure family is important 7-->9 anyways). P.S. Coke, Mountain Dew, Budweiser, Miller, Heineken, etc... make why are they in every ritalin fed baby boomer's child in every nascar driven rating on the rise We might've been human but i fear we cannot live without J.L. Koehler |
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| © Copyright 2001 J.L. Koehler - All Rights Reserved | |||
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xEmperorEmber Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 136tx |
You can write. |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
You have hit the nail on the head! Too often time, effort and money are wasted on these things, and all that money could be going where it is REALLY needed. Helping the starving etc. It's a screwed up world at times, I'm the first to admit!! Quite thought provoking!! Isis *The greatest warrior is one that does not need to fight* ~Isis~ |
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The Exile Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 52Ontario, Canada |
WOW!! AMAZING creativity i must say. Although the poem looks very weird at the first sight, it certainly made A LOT of sense once i started to relate it to the world around. Contentwisely speaking, by juxtaposing a bunch of seemingly less related (or completely unrelated) images together, you seemed to have successfully created (or demonstrated more precisely) a net of emptiness in which we are all trapped. Structurewisely i think, it's a very well written typical self-reflexive poem. Although not long, the form clicks so well with the content: you broke up a complete sentence ("... in every move we ... make... ") and inserted all kinds of images in fragments in between, which reflected the meaning of the poem so precisely if i didn't get that wrong. (u r athorized to punch me in the eye if i did, LOL) One interesting thing i noticed as i read it again and again is that, the shape of the posted poem looks like a flying bird of some sort, which makes it even more thought-provoking: a bird breaking out of the net flying freely! Need i say more?  Did that also come outta your spark of creativity or was it just a coincident? Anyway, i must say it one heck of a poem and i really enjoyed it!!  *applauds n cheers* -Alex |
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carolinadreams Member
since 2000-07-20
Posts 142 |
I don't often times reply, and I am very sorry. I tried to sum up all of all with it and pitch it as an advertisement for the U.S.A. While at the same time trying to invoke creativity with known devices. Yes, it was meant to be very political (invocation of every side), but it was also supposed to be what I hope has happened. I love when people write, and even more so when you feel an inspired writer. Coincidence is for you to decide. I Love. |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
WOW, a vry unusual style but this one packs a punch. Strangely it ties in with something I was thinking about after watching the film "Network" which is a dark satire about the power of television. We are all Gap kids, heh? ranting here, powerful words. "Here I am in prison,here I am with a ball and chain There is whiskey in the jar-o" Traditional irish song. |
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