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Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704


0 posted 2001-01-19 07:24 AM


Always

and silently my love
silently, if my voice or
eyes are undesirous

you breathe phrase and I
am spun in hurt,
you are too bold for the delicacy
of my belief

Faith extends so far,
it cannot draw the divide
into sections I can cross

I gape empty
yes, I fail in the light of offering
overhung with ambition and
self sufficiency

you
      storm

and darkened, I run
yet the journey is toward
and not away

profounded, the ocean maid consorts
with waves, huddles beneath her sky

undone

This is not the walk I choose, safety
lies among my memories, but oh how
I am bled through

I frail in my stride, my immortal,
enmired in this loose definition of
safety and wound,
sweet dreamer, I’m ascending
yet I cannot step alone

perhaps I’ll turn, stay with the tides
I know

you

reside in inspiration, and surely
I can only long to follow

© K. Mahony





[This message has been edited by Severn (edited 01-19-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Kamla Mahony - All Rights Reserved
Joel the wolf
Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333
Angels Camp
1 posted 2001-01-19 08:28 AM


Simply Awesome, really!!
and I love this stanza

"I frail in my stride, my immortal,
enmired in this loose definition of
safety and wound,
sweet dreamer, I’m ascending
yet I cannot step alone"

I love it.
Joel.



I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel.

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
2 posted 2001-01-19 09:54 AM


Oh Kamla,

How much have I missed reading your exquisite writing...

Great work!!!

Regards,
Sudhir

Verve
Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 348
Singapore
3 posted 2001-01-19 01:37 PM




WOW!!!!! This is really good sutff. I am truly amazed.  


cheers.

He
Junior Member
since 2001-01-15
Posts 41

4 posted 2001-01-19 01:38 PM


She
the silence
     of heart
        bespoken
   eyes
of the ocean maid
wanting
     in longing
to touch
     the world
       of landed peace

too strange
      unknown
but the yearning
         her sigh
  as a single raindrop
     annoints
       her
in the crash of surf
    the undertow
       safe
   its door to vast
emptiness
where the thunder waves
were never heard

     before

now she pauses
   half round the world
       not possible
         land unsighted
   unremitting
      clear
        crescendo

as rythmn builds
     she to waters still
        ice flows
          palm worlds
   depths her domain
       still
she hears
  
my world
  my life
    my refuged home
  you cannot
      she cries

waves of thunder
       steadfast reply

undone eyes
        widen
    this moment

thunder

she hears
  not
without
      but from

       inside




      
      
      




[This message has been edited by He (edited 01-19-2001).]

Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

5 posted 2001-01-19 04:36 PM


Oh! i love this..so romantic..i havent read in here for a while..i see i have been missing alot ha...wonderful write from you

                  ~V~


A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
- Paul Valery (1871-1945)



Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

6 posted 2001-01-19 06:00 PM


This is not the walk I choose, safety
lies among my memories, but oh how
I am bled through

hmm K, you don't know how much I relate to this. Well put my dear.

Maree



[This message has been edited by Dark Angel (edited 01-19-2001).]

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

7 posted 2001-01-19 07:47 PM


It's beautiful and so are you!

Kathleen



Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

8 posted 2001-01-27 05:56 AM


(sorry for the late replies)

Joel - wow - that's pretty staggering. Thankyou so much for your very gracious words.  

Suddy - YAY bounce! So lovely to see you...lovely lovely..hugs my friend.

Verve - staggering again lol...thankyou so much...

Dear He - You know I have already replied to this in so very many ways...thanks for more and more every day...more thanks than I know how to convey.

Victoria - heh, looks like I had been missing a lot too...lol. Thankyou hon..

Mmy - I know dear. I know. Hugs, and thankyou for your reply..

Kathleen - now that is just a beautiful thing to say...thankyou...

K

mystic requiem
Member
since 2001-01-26
Posts 144

9 posted 2001-01-27 10:44 AM


I enjoyed the flow of your words. They seem to keep the reader wanting more. Well done!
*S*

mYsTiC

[This message has been edited by mystic requiem (edited 01-27-2001).]

Zinsser
Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641
Calif.
10 posted 2002-04-16 02:08 PM


perhaps I’ll turn, stay with the tides
I know

you

reside in inspiration, and surely
I can only long to follow
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Great Lines
~~ Connie ~~

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
11 posted 2002-04-16 02:30 PM


Simi?

stranger by the day...

(i never did get a chance to tell you that i felt this one.)


Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

12 posted 2002-04-16 06:15 PM


Someone brought this up? Connie...well..thanks..I'd all but forgotten it, and thanks for the great lines...

C - you did? Hmm...remember what I said about poetic growth? I can see my own when I read this...maybe I need to go play with words again...hugs you...

K

Jamie
Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
13 posted 2002-04-16 10:53 PM


I remember not replying to this at the time ~weak grin~... of course you knew what I thought anyway... heh

Big Giant PoohBear Hugs Dear!
J


My how your writing has grown and evolved

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

NapalmsConstantlyConfused
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 529

14 posted 2002-04-17 12:11 PM


*Dave feels mildly anticlimactic for saying this but:*
I like this.
Ok then.


-Dave, with his Bad Anticlimactic Self.

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

15 posted 2002-04-17 07:22 AM


LOL Dave...haha...I'm not so sure I do now! It was written sooooo long ago...my writing is totally different (shhhhhh..but I'm totally uncomfortable with this poem..sitting up here heh...part of life that's long gone...~blush~)

Cheers dude..

K

Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression
16 posted 2002-04-17 07:41 AM


I think you followed well in inspiration,
Despite time or place
Events or life’s pace
Always nice to see displayed emotion

Gloom

LadyPeach1
Member
since 2001-06-04
Posts 282

17 posted 2002-04-28 05:21 PM


My gosh, I wish I was as good of a poet as you.  You are SPECTACULAR! this poem is amazing.  
LadyPeach1

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

18 posted 2002-04-30 08:38 PM


I'm always a sucker for ocean poems. Loved it.
Purity
Senior Member
since 2001-11-20
Posts 526
Once Upon, USA
19 posted 2002-05-03 02:02 AM


Even in its "Hall of Fame" state, from which you now state your writing has changed, there is an eternal line..."You are too bold for the delicacy of my belief"
Far too often in my experiences, the "one" truly wants (secretively), but the "boldness" belittles the truth of those feelings... Not unlike the "Why should I care what my thoughts are when I'm alone at night thinking on such things...I've got too much to do and prove in reality...this can't be"
Earlier work or not, and you having progressed or not, this hit home in the most poetic of specific ways. Great.

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