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devina
Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539
Cali

0 posted 2002-07-28 03:58 PM





Just another
dark bridge day-
emotions float on seaweed
escaping swift to bay.
Forward my salutations
as momentum gathers pace-
determined that I falter
with lack of social grace.
Currents raging swiftly
as I sink to undertow-
stealing shallow breaths in bit
Cursing emotions tidal flow.
No escapade comes easy
in murky water’s bout
Flounder as finale
Lacking luster-fill devout.
Clinging moss-surrender
around these curse-ed turns-
Blindly I relinquish to
this bridge I thought I’d burned.


Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...


[This message has been edited by devina (07-28-2002 05:30 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Tanya Nicole Bustamante - All Rights Reserved
PoeticGoddessOfDepression
Member
since 2002-07-02
Posts 439
I am everywhere
1 posted 2002-07-28 04:30 PM


"No escapade comes easy
in murky water’s bout
Flounder as finale
Lacking luster-fill devout."

I really enjoyed reading this.
Very dark... and a little scary.  You have this way of writing... it just makes me keep reading...
Continue this.

(I feel weird saying this... but you spelt 'fireproof' with 3 O's... thought you might like to know.)

-Sara


If the world hates you for who you are, and you hate yourself for who are aren't... who do you change for?

devina
Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539
Cali
2 posted 2002-07-28 05:32 PM


yeppers...fixed that word...and? I blame it all on the baby waking up and having to rush to post this!!

Thanks Sara~ and don't worry bout that..feel free to catch that anytime!!!

Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...



MidnightSon
Member
since 2002-05-15
Posts 312
between the gutter & the stars
3 posted 2002-07-28 06:41 PM


when you take a metaphor, you really run with it... and i love that.

fireproof bridges...a concept i'm all too familiar with...
and this one i wish i'd thought of...*grr*
hehehe.
enjoyed, as usual.

it's our struggle for identity that leaves us all unknown

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

4 posted 2002-07-28 08:36 PM


Can I write like you? Pleeease? Loved it, d/T.

She said burn ... together.
-TON

brian sites
Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475
usa
5 posted 2002-07-29 01:02 AM


like them liquid words
missus sighing d
silent bri

I never aimed at reality; I aimed at truth. --Orson Welles

EveGnosis
Member
since 2002-02-21
Posts 300
New York, USA
6 posted 2002-07-29 01:09 AM


i've tried so hard to not falter with lack of social grace in my business, that i've faltered my way short of the mark.
a phenom of truth to my heart and conscience regarding my place in social standing life, and the place i allow myself to fall short of in gaining the one i want most.
i loved this, devina! thanks for opening my eyes once again to things more "pure" than social cause to be!

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

7 posted 2002-07-29 03:40 AM


great flow! ponderously dark, this reads like watching a leaf float in a lazy current...and I love the one-two punch of your final line. I like this one much, sister-mine! (the title was a nice touch too!) applauding you over here.
CrEaTuRe
Member
since 2000-01-01
Posts 260
Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia
8 posted 2002-07-29 07:58 AM


It's just great to watch the way the web of words are made and ure flow is good

Love CoMeS To ThOsE WhO Still HoPe AlThOuGh They've BeeN DiSaPpOiNteD,To ThOsE WhO StiLL BeLiEvE AlThOuGh ThEy'Ve BeeN BeTraYeD,LoVe KeEpS ThEm GoInG

EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
9 posted 2002-07-29 09:41 AM


Excellent!
Anvrill
Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710
in the interzone now
10 posted 2002-07-29 01:03 PM


Awesome flow. Drags you right in, then refuses t' let you go. And I quite honestly didn't mean to rhyme there.

Yummy poem!

written in blood before everything went black

JCV

devina
Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539
Cali
11 posted 2002-07-29 06:26 PM



MidnightSon- you sweetie...try to make a bold girl blush...

Mike- now why would you wanna go and do a thang like that??? we ALL know how *disturbed* I am of late...grins*

Brian- hmm...sighing d & silent bri??? what a freaking combo man...I LIKE it!!!

Eve- glad I could give you the eye opener dearest...usually I get that- but it's more like one of those "what the hell??" looks...smiles to you!!!

serenity- applause? I thought I told you I wanted DANCIN??? *she says with the serious look*

Creature- thanks for the peek in my web...

EagleOne- thank you hun..always good to hear from an old friend...

Lori- c'mon lady...you ARE a poetess...sometimes we just can't help it!! grins you!!

Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...



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