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Dark Poetry #3
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Anvrill
Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710
in the interzone now

0 posted 2002-06-22 02:58 PM


I wrote it through the eyes of a male, actually. Kieran Davies. Part of a more-than-long story I wrote. (like, several novels long) He was, of course, a handy outlet for feelings I didn't want to own up to, so I gave him an almost-girlfriend who had ODed and died. Oh, the things we do to run from our own emotions.


You were beautiful,

you know.

Shades of candlelight and incense,

too thin against the dull aura;

winter-white with shadow cheeks,

burning eyes,

drowning hair.

You were beautiful,

you know.

Elegant in a timid way,

smile soft enough

to wrap my heart

around and around.



You lay so still

in the dark brown Kist

that I stopped breathing.

You lay so still

that I prayed

my life could be lost

for yours.



I want to give you everything;

all the chances

you decided to throw away.

You were beautiful,

too thin in shades of incense,

so still

in the too dark

coffin.




And is it bad if one of my creations, therefore a subdivision of my own mind writes poetry that makes me jealous?

Feel my angsty reachiness!

© Copyright 2002 LL Hager - All Rights Reserved
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

1 posted 2002-06-22 03:00 PM


Daaaaamn. This poem stands along outside the story's context. You are a wonder, Lorigrrl.

She said burn ... together.
-TON

Tiersdin
Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364
east coast
2 posted 2002-06-22 03:55 PM


Excellent!

Wish I could read the story!


~Tier

arthur
Senior Member
since 2001-08-14
Posts 678
england
3 posted 2002-06-22 07:44 PM


evocative
arthur

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
4 posted 2002-06-23 12:14 PM


Ditto on the kudos.

Quite tender and loving,
In that "too late" kinda way.

~wranx

Anvrill
Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710
in the interzone now
5 posted 2002-06-23 05:18 PM


Actually, funny thing about this is... (As Mike must have forgotten) the poem written by Kieran Davies don't really hafta do with the story. I just put poems between chapters in this story to seperate things out, fill space, have an excuse for poetry, etc. Kieran is by FAR my favorite character to write poetry through. Not just because he's dark and broody and one of those feel-my-angst teens, but because he's got this soft soft soft sadness around him....

But yeh. I actually have the novels (yes, novels) on th' net... But they're so immature (because the characters range from 13 to .. well, thousands of years old, but still), and very very very angsty. I actually STARTED writing them when I was 13, but the've been kept up to a moderately sane version of my current writing. It's just that you can't completely fix without completely rewriting... And I CAN'T rewrite, what is it, six novels? Augh, I've been doing this writing thing far too long...

Feel my angsty reachiness!

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