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Dawn of the Lonely (song)
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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Dawn of the Lonely (song) |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico 
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Dawn of the Lonely: Lost alone in weeping tiles. Rubix cubes and crossword puzzles. Forest dreams of bitten future. Alone like much the rest x2 Woke up yesterday in a blank. Killed time with my pot and spoon. And oh the knives are shiny, And yea the forks defy me. Trying to find my way. Black room engulfs my sight. Attack gloom shuts out the light. Alone like much the rest x4 Blister kinsman run away. Family dead, friends in head. Sun shine on another day. Alone like much the rest.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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| © Copyright 2001 Pepe de la Muerte - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Hallie_Angel Member
since 2000-12-06
Posts 102 |
Hmm... Dopey, Not a lot of poems make me think. But your did. It was very clever and meaningfull. Great Job! Always, ~Caherine |
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CareBear3 Junior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 39New Hampshire |
This was very cool, do you write guitar tabs or piano or something when you do this, or is it just the words? Well I shouldn't say "just" cause these words say a lot. Nice job. "In great moments life seems neither right nor wrong but something greater it seems inevitable" ~Kelley |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
ooh, internal rhyme: "Family dead, friends in head." i caught that immediately, whether it was purposely composed that way or not i got the first stanza, the rest drew a blank thanks for the read ~JDR "I am two minded. I have two sides of thinking." |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
"alone like all the rest" This is a great line in that it pretty much contradicts itself... alone, just like all the others that are alone... Ah... lovely song. Great use of repetition. -Allan |
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Dark Enchantress Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258meet Morgana |
Wonderful song....you take your inspirations much, much farther than most people ever do....or ever could....I loved it.  It's kind of ironic how in a world of cell phones, emails, computers with the internet, long distance phone calls, and even the "ancient" letters....we're all alone. Sorry, random thoughts. I'll never do it again. Well...maybe. < !signature-->I am no one if not myself. Angel of Darkness [This message has been edited by Dark Enchantress (edited 01-30-2001).] |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well Thank you all for the compliments. hallie- glad it made you think carebear- no i don't write the tabs of the songs you've seen so far. For some reason I do things seperately. I have music written without lyrics....and I have lyrics without music. I have yet to COMBINE anything to make a full song. Soon enough! jer- I know how you could have gotten lost, the main idea is loneliness. I'm sure you caught that one. Allan- thanks.........yea it sucks being alone tho....... Dark- Wow, yer the first person to say that to me. Thanks pal! I guess you could all guess what this song was about.....but there's quite a bit of symbolism in it. None of which has been asked to be explained, so I won't. Thanks all! I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
ok, i'm tired of asking for an MP3 everytime i see a song posted Despite the lyrics being deep for a song, I still think it would make a great song by the way, who artist(s) would you love to sing your song(s)? let me guess..Barry Manilow?  lol j/kjust kidding Dopes gotta be Dru Hill, 112, LSG(if they're still around) I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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