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Open Poetry #12
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If You Should Go (Sonnet)
| Open Poetry #12 |
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If You Should Go (Sonnet) |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME 
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If you should go, would I forget to breathe? Most likely not, although each breath brought pain. It's possible, although I can't believe, That one day I would learn to smile again. You do not want it said you are my life. I feel you are, but will not tell you so. I wouldn't want to cause you any strife. My tears may flow, but I won't let you know. Instead, I'll tell you of the joy you bring, A sweet assurance I have never known. You care, and winter's chill is turned to spring. Though you might leave, I'll never be alone. If separated from you I should be, I'd live because you are a part of me. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Marilyn Gordon - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Mr.Magoo Member
since 2001-01-20
Posts 104 |
Very Nice poem Mam. How true it is that loved ones no matter how distant, they are always with us in our hearts as well as our thoughts. Once again Very Nicely written. Mr.Magoo |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Hey Grandma, good to see you in Open, although I do enjoy visiting you in the Corner Pub! This...is very nice!... |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
If separated from you I should be, I'd live because you are a part of me. brings tears to my eyes this morning..very lovely sonnet ~Wynter "The worst prison would be a closed heart". ...Pope John Paul II |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Excellent sonnet...they happen to be a favorite of mine  |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
lovely write kcsgrandma HUGS..enjoyed ~V~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
oh mar..that first line..catches my breath... and this: "Though you might leave, I'll never be alone. If separated from you I should be, I'd live because you are a part of me." wow... great write mar..i love this.. hugs, g "...beyond the door, theres peace i'm sure...and i know there'll be no more tears in heaven..." clapton |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
Mr. Magoo - Thank you kindly, Sir. Yes, those we love always leave little bits of themselves with us. Sunshine - Thanks! I was kind of scared to venture out into the big Open world, but dg talked me into it. Nice to see you anywhere.Wynter - Thank you for sharing about the tears. I am touched. Hoot Owl - Thank you. I have discovered I enjoy writing in this form. Victoria - Thank you! HUGS back to you! To love another person is to see the face of God. - Les Miserables Marilyn |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
Hey, Gale! You sneaked in on me. Thanks for the wow. That first line was really the basis for the whole sonnet. I thought of it, and had to finish the thought. Thanks for reading. hugsTo love another person is to see the face of God. - Les Miserables Marilyn |
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David2 Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 407 |
Thank you for a well written sonnet.I enjoyed reading it as of course sonnets are one of my favorite forms. This was well done. David2 |
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BloomingRose Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092Florida |
I like the sentiment in this one. Very nicely written. Deb |
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
Enjoyed this very much, I have never written a sonnet, you make me want to try my hand at it. You do it so well, using everyday words that make so much sense. |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
David2 - Thank you for reading, and for saying it was well-written. Deb - Thank you. Guess I'm just a sentimental gal. Songbird - Thank you. I hope you do try it. And thank you for the compliment about the language. Big words are fun, but you don't usually use them when speaking to your loved ones, and that is what I am doing here. To love another person is to see the face of God. - Les Miserables Marilyn |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
kcs, welcome to the big OPEN world... i ditto dg..i liked the first line lots i ditto songbird...i never thought sonnets can be written in such a simple manner...still suffering from the effects from attempting to unravel Shakespeare's sonnets..sigh..may i ask for directions as to how to write a sonnet?will love to try this form... stay a while while you are here, okay |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Beautiful sonnet, Marilyn! Absolutely beautiful! Denise |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
grandma, this is what's known as a PERFECT sonnet, every syllable, every line...perfect. What a beautiful thing to read...thank you! |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Love is so sweet and sad at once, isn't it? This is a very lovely poem. I enjoyed it and related to it. Sandra |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
Kaile - Thank you, my friend. It is not quite so scary as I imagined, though the Pub is awfully cozy! I will e-mail you some information about sonnets tomorrow, but I'll warn you, they can become addictive. Denise - Thank you. Balladeer - Wow! Perfect? That sure is nice to hear. Thanks for the kind words.Sandra - Thank you. Yes, love often does bring mixed emotions. I'm glad you enjoyed. To love another person is to see the face of God. - Les Miserables Marilyn |
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