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Open Poetry #12
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Explosion of Memory
| Open Poetry #12 |
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Explosion of Memory |
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laryalee Member
since 2000-06-19
Posts 352Alberta, Canada |
The ribbons of her day uncurl across the barren floor, a starkly-fingered dawn outlines her trail of tethered chores. As muted moments, sparsely-clad, are nudging her along, the radio awakens with an old familiar song.... Sudden explosion - shrapnel of notes - minefield of echoes the music evokes. Pounding waves hurtled, pain thunders through - depths of her emptiness swirling anew. His love was her shield and his comfort was warm, till vulturous fates left her cold and unarmed. His absence cuts circles agape in her soul, their hollowness taunting - she'll never be whole. ....She feels remembered warmth against her skin; her heart enfolds the tune they loved so well. Now petals of her agony lie strewn along the path that lonely carves to hell. [This message has been edited by laryalee (edited 01-30-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Laryalee Fraser - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Well this made the tears fill my eyes ......wow, such a powerful emotional punch this packs.......got me right in my heart.....and of course, I loved it!  -SEA |
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kcsgrandma Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522Presque Isle, ME |
The ribbons of her day uncurl across the barren floor, a starkly-fingered dawn outlines her trail of tethered chores. ***************** You caught me here and kept me to the end with your exquisite words and deep emotion. Well done! To love another person is to see the face of God. - Les Miserables Marilyn |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
His love was her shield and his comfort was warm, till vulturous fates left her cold and unarmed. His absence cuts circles agape in her soul, their hollowness taunting - she'll never be whole. ....She feels remembered warmth against her skin; her heart enfolds the tune they loved so well. Now petals of her agony lie strewn along the path that lonely carves to hell. ====================== very emotive, expressive piece of work here... mos impressive writing excellent use of imagery to convey the starkness of the emotions Ive read some of your other posts tonite as well and will look for more... well done take care jm If my slight Muse do please these curious days ... The pain be mine ... but thine shall be the praise. ~Shakespeare~ |
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laryalee Member
since 2000-06-19
Posts 352Alberta, Canada |
SEA, Marilyn, Janet... Thank you so much for your comments - so very appreciated. Tomorrow I'll be back to read more...Marilyn, I already made a quick trip to your website - awesome! CU later! Lary |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
love this, the whole thing, but the ending especially touching |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
damn! you're good......! |
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laryalee Member
since 2000-06-19
Posts 352Alberta, Canada |
Bless you all! I'm so glad I found this home! I cried many tears with this poem - it actually happened when I was out shopping - turned my car radio on - the BeeGees singing 'When the lights all went out in Massachusetts".... Seven months - I thought I was healing. I had to come home, couldn't stop crying. I didn't expect it.... Doreen - you know how I love your work - in fact, you have influenced the poem I'll be posting next. I feel as though I'm beginning to str-e-t-ch a little *g*. jellybeans, I really love your poems, too - having a hard time keeping up with them all *g*. I'm still getting lost around here - trying to track down people (like Janet Marie - one moment you're there, but if I get sidetracked I lose you, LOL!) The posts flipping by so rapidly, leaves me breathless! (So happy we all came through the move.) Thanks! Lary |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent writing, laryalee. You have expressed exactly how those moments take us by surprise. Very well written! |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
THIS touched me deeply "I walked beside the evening sea and dreamed a dream that could not be." George William Curtis |
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