»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #11
»
Nocturne
| Open Poetry #11 |
|
Nocturne |
|
|
Tony Abbot Member
since 2000-11-18
Posts 209North Wales,UK |
Some memories linger in my mind's eye, Brief moments caught in frozen time, That will stay with me until I die, Outliving this ephemeral rhyme. One night still holds such piquancy, Though many years have passed since then, A memory that I hold dear to me, For I never saw your face again. That night, sweet nature served us well, The rain hung suspended in the sky, The stage was set for lovers to dwell, Only you knew our love was destined to die. We were both such troubled souls, Having taken refuge in each other's dreams, Love and life, out of our control, Perhaps we both knew things weren't as they seemed. We walked beneath the half crescent moon, Which reflected in your glacial eyes, And I felt as though we were cocooned, From all deceit and hurtful lies. This time, I felt things would go right, We will walk beneath this empyrean revealed, And spend this magic, star strewn night, Lost in a labyrinth of lilac fields. Yet I had noticed in your demeanour, A reticence never there before, Had you found a place where the grass was greener, In the arms of one who loved you more? Practiced in this art, I asked, To hear of your new lover's name, The sky turned a deeper shade of black, As if the moon had hid her face in shame. Your tears glistened in the remaining light, Some clandestine alliance was meekly avowed, As your words diffused into the silent night, They cast a sempiternal shroud. I bore no malice, for what was your crime, But to vitiate my deluded bliss? You wrought your ivory hand from mine, And parted with an awkward kiss. All live for dreams, some may come true, And some may go astray, But to preserve this memory of you, That night, I gave my dreams away. 'Humankind cannot bear too much reality' T.S.Eliot |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Tony Abbot - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Mattster Junior Member
since 2000-11-17
Posts 29 |
Tony, this is a well-told (or: written) story. Gotta love those last two lines. |
||
|
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Some memories linger in my mind's eye, Brief moments caught in frozen time, That will stay with me until I die, Outliving this ephemeral rhyme. One night still holds such piquancy, Though many years have passed since then, A memory that I hold dear to me, For I never saw your face again. That night, sweet nature served us well, The rain hung suspended in the sky, The stage was set for lovers to dwell, Only you knew our love was destined to die. =============== This time, I felt things would go right, We will walk beneath this empyrean revealed, And spend this magic, star strewn night, Lost in a labyrinth of lilac fields. Yet I had noticed in your demeanour, A reticence never there before, Had you found a place where the grass was greener, In the arms of one who loved you more? ================= The sky turned a deeper shade of black, As if the moon had hid her face in shame. Your tears glistened in the remaining light, Some clandestine alliance was meekly avowed, As your words diffused into the silent night, They cast a sempiternal shroud. I bore no malice, for what was your crime, But to vitiate my deluded bliss? You wrought your ivory hand from mine, And parted with an awkward kiss. All live for dreams, some may come true, And some may go astray, But to preserve this memory of you, That night, I gave my dreams away. =============== oh WOW...this is the COOLest poem.... the imagery...the metaphors...the very unique vocabulary and verbiage.. and the way you have written in its cryptic, mystical essence is exceptional... outstanding woork here... I will add this to my library to read again as one time wont do this one justice... take care jm "What the caterpillar calls the end ... The world calls a butterfly" Lao Tze Tao ~Butterflies are meant to be free~ |
||
|
Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
You are practiced in the art of poetry, that is for certain. Excellent. Corinne |
||
|
Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Tony, absolutly enthralling... great read, atleast for the words I understood. Where is that damn dictionary.  Parker |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Oh...my...would you accept, Sir, my silent applause?... so very well done.... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
||
|
Lighthousebob Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725California |
 I can relate too well to the loves that continue in my mind of what could have been if... a very cold night, but a warm memory indeed. Your poem brought many of my own images to mind and I must admit though the relationships never worked out they remain quite pleasent in my mind. Thank you for sharing. Bob <><[This message has been edited by Lighthousebob (edited 11-20-2000).] |
||
|
jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
very nice, it is not easy to look back fondyly sometimes, when the heart might wish otherwise nice work |
||
Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Tony very good work, I really like this one, it's an excellant write from you. Ahh looking back to what might have beens. Really good poem. Take care Marsha  Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
||
|
Tony Abbot Member
since 2000-11-18
Posts 209North Wales,UK |
Thank you all for replying.Much appreciated. 'Humankind cannot bear too much reality' T.S.Eliot |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
