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Open Poetry #7
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Gasp
| Open Poetry #7 |
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Gasp |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California 
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GASP A pause of silence fixated between heaving cries of anguish, I walk, ever so tentatively among stepping stones of trepidation, fear guides me and always I follow. Time freezes as all thought suspends, caught in an eerie abandonment of sound hovering about me, thick with the filmy essence of isolation. How long till the bubble burst? Till sticky walls of reality collapse unto me... How long, till agony returns? Pulse pounding my temples, pressure building. Pain, though mental, takes physical form in my chest. Scouring eyes see nothing, blurs and shadows swallowing all images of hope. Who dares touch me now? Why do you insist to pierce this anemic shell? Can you not just wait till the cry returns? Can I not just catch my breath, before resuming the bleeding of my soul? Michael Anderson [This message has been edited by Michael (edited 04-24-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Cassanova Junior Member
since 2000-04-12
Posts 39Turlock, Ca. |
Breathe man, breathe! Wow Michael! I felt the inhalation of anguish clearly etched into this piece! Fairly caught me by surprise, it did! |
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rene Member
since 2000-04-24
Posts 113 |
i like your hair, i understand your anguish |
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Daysleeper Member
since 2000-04-23
Posts 119 |
Michael- This peice is incredible. I don't think there is anything I could specifically say about it. You've done such a beautiful job of conveying a feeling, a moment, an emotion, that I think it knocks your readers off their feet. I know it did me. Here and now, all I have to say is, wow. ...Daysleeper... "Presently I've had enough of all your sanity." -James Kavanaugh |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent writing, Michael. I can 'feel' the anguish in your words. It reminded me of the way I felt too many days in my first marriage. Horrible way to live for so many years. Thank God those days are far behind me. I wish you peace, Michael. Denise |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
Micheal, All I can say is WOW!!! The way you convey feelings and emotions is terrific yet horrifying at the same time. Another outstanding work from you. All my love, Jeffrey |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
I just felt pain on a page...it was amazing. Kathleen |
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Lost Dreamer Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464Somewhere near the Rainbow |
Michael, You always put so much emotion into your poetry it truly is amazing, I feel your message very strongly, I am sorry for your pain. |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Oh Michael..I too can relate to this. Your words are so powerful, so intense, they tear at me...especially: Time freezes as all thought suspends, caught in an eerie abandonment of sound hovering about me, thick with the filmy essence of isolation. Exellent work, as always. You have extraordinary talent.  *Krista Knutson* As soon as man does not take his existence for granted, but beholds it as something unfathomably mysterious, thought begins. ~*Albert Schweitzer*~ |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
"Gasping, I forgot to breathe...." Love to you, sweet Michael... |
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Rosemary J. Gwaltney Senior Member
since 1999-08-26
Posts 997northern mountains, Idaho |
I don't think I've ever read a poem that more vividly describes anguish than this one. Heartbreakingly well written. It tears at me fiercely. The last four lines are so starkly painful. Excellent, terribly sad poem. |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
This was like a baseball bat to the jaw -- I wish there were more poetic words to describe it, but if there are, I cannot seem to find them ... Powerful, raw, uncompromising -- in a word -- WOW!  --Me |
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mariee66 Senior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 596Recess, OfYourMind |
I have felt this anguish which you write of so well~ Your talent never ceases to amaze me~ Marie~ |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Michael, this feels like panic to me, the panic of fear and desperation. And you paint this portrait way too well, a place where one shouldn't for too long dwell. Peace, my friend. Corinne |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Michael, you are an awesome poet. The way you write with your heart on your pen --using perfect words describing indescribable pain, and yet there it sits -----anquish ------fear ------ I hope whatever your pain is, my friend, that you never have to face it again. netswan |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Michael~ Raw and gripping. 'fear guides me and always I follow.' Uniquely you. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Gasping in awe, I sit here humbled by the brutal intensity of your devotion to the art of emotion Michael. Somehow this piece speaks to me more than any save one you've written, (Porcelian Knight.) And that you've strayed from your normal formats into the realm of free verse only makes this piece that much stronger. Take a bow my friend, for you're recieveing a standing ovation. |
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lucky Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601Idaho |
Michael Man oh man, can you heave a heartfull. It's awful to think anyone would ever know such. Again, you've put it together all to well. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Exactly. |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
Dear sweet Michael - I read your poem, not once but twice - the intensity of it and the anguish it conveys is awesome. I wish you days filled with sunshine and happiness to follow. Roniece |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
me again! Michael, can you please tell me if any of your work has been published in hardcopy? You are an extremely talented poet and I would so enjoy being able to purchase a copy of your writings. Roniece |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Just wanted to say thank you to each and all of you for such gracious replies. Jason, I think I need to invest in an inhaler... rene, LOL at the hair... denise, it is a horrible way to live. i am glad you are beyond that now. Jefferey, thanks, bud. I hope that was "horrofying" in a good way...LOL Daysleeper, thank you, that is quite the compliment. Krista, as your words always seem to do me. serenity, seems to be my problem of late too... maybe we should do a yoga class together or something. kess, batter up....next, LOL, thanks dear netswan, Unfortuantely it's a pain that never goes away. Just part of who I am. Corinne, PANIC - Indeed. Marge, me unique?...na - just different...LOL Christopher, I am feeling quite "porcelain" of late...  Lucky, sincerest thanks. Claire, *sigh* - I know Roniece, nothing in print yet - working on it though. Michael |
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