She is like Water - pipTalk Forums

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PoeticKnight
Senior Member

since 2000-01-20

Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA

0 posted 2000-04-20 09:36 AM

She is like water
That I am floating in
Floating helpless upon her
As the water comes seeping in

Her water warm to the touch
Clean and pure
Her water heals so much
Providing me a cure
From the mortal disease
For when I am wet,
It’s as if my heart seized
And I, not born just yet

While her currents may take me
To many a different shore,
Her love’s an endless sea,
Her beauty’s as deep as the seas are
She brings life to those that live
And touches all who sail upon her
Something beyond life she gives
For that I am indebted to her

She is like water
That I am drowning in
But I am allowing her
To slowly take me in

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

1 posted 2000-04-20 09:55 AM

While her currents may take me
To many a different shore,
Her love’s an endless sea,
Her beauty’s as deep as the seas are
She brings life to those that live
And touches all who sail upon her
Something beyond life she gives
For that I am indebted to her

She is like water
That I am drowning in
But I am allowing her
To slowly take me in
----------------

this poem takes me in...
this is a perfect example of what makes your poetry so cool...you write with such intensity of emotion and such depth of your feelings...and then there is always the metaphors and imagery to add to the beauty of the emotions expressed.
all this makes for a serene and lovely read.
Well, I have nothing left to say but...
*SIGH*(smile)
perfection jer, again.
stalking you immersed,
your jm

Well the sun sets gently on your shoulders
And it makes me want to touch you there.
And the light in your eyes makes me feel
Like there's something much better out there
Something kind...
And I know someday I might be looking around
Trying to find some purpose
Well purpose it can't be that hard to find
As long as I've got the wind...
The wind and your love to carry me.
vertical horizon

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

2 posted 2000-04-20 03:05 PM

I enjoyed reading this...really liked the last four lines. James

dhuron
Member

since 2000-03-19

Posts 476

3 posted 2000-04-20 05:11 PM

Wonderful Poem. I really like poems with some kind of water metaphor in them. This one was full of emotion and feelings. Deep as the Oceans. Great Job

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

4 posted 2000-04-20 11:28 PM

Excellent as always my friend. . . almost makes you not want to have a lifejacket. . .

Simply full of love and delicate romance. . .another gem. . .

-------------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

5 posted 2000-04-21 02:53 AM

JML~ what a beautiful poem! the last four lines melted me.-SEA

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